


Don't lose your light, my Sun.

by satoglad



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters: Sun & Moon | Pokemon Sun & Moon Versions
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Ash Crossdressing, Bottom Satoshi | Ash Ketchum, Boys In Love, Coming Out, Crossdressing Kink, Cute Gladion, Cute Satoshi | Ash Ketchum, Depression, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff, Gay Sex, Gentle Sex, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Insecurity, Intimate Wound Cleaning, Light Dom/sub, Loss of Parent(s), M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Original Character(s), Minor Violence, One-Sided Ash Ketchum/Miette, One-Sided Attraction, Please Don't Hate Me, Possessive Gladion, Post-Pokemon Sun & Moon, Satoshi | Ash Ketchum Can Talk to Pokemon, Satoshi | Ash Ketchum Needs a Hug, Self-Harm, Smut, Suicide Attempt, Sweet Gladion, Top Gladion, implied/referenced eating disorder, sad ash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:34:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25455538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satoglad/pseuds/satoglad
Summary: [ Previously named "Stay with me, lay with me" ]! PLEASE CHECK TAGS, THEMES FOUND IN THIS STORY MAY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME AUDIENCES !He's finally back in Alola. Even after all that time, it's still so familiar to him. He had spent over a year on the beautiful cluster of islands and even became the first champion, so it's no surprise that it feels like home. However, everything is different. He knows better than anyone that nothing is immune to change. Apparently, some things never change, though.At least, some feelings never do.
Relationships: Gladio | Gladion/Satoshi | Ash Ketchum
Comments: 18
Kudos: 80





	1. Returning Home

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoy this story, its still a work in progress but im hoping i can update in a timely manner now instead of making you wait half a year. keep in mind that everyone in this story is 18+!! underage mature content is disgusting and makes me uncomfy. i hope you all enjoy and please remember to read the tags because some themes of this story could be very triggering.
> 
> if you want more updates, follow my writing twitter @nessiesary_
> 
> also yes i know ash doesn't actually have a sister, but for the sake of the story, he does now!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> home is where the heart belongs.

"Ash!"

Ash bounded off the boat at a startling pace, dropping his suitcase's handle as he ran full speed at his Alolan family, colliding with them to be engulfed in a massive group hug. Kukui, Kiawe, Sophocles, Mallow, Lana, and Lillie circled Ash on every side, squeezing the life out of the teen as he did his best to return the embrace. As expected, Kiawe was so happy he was crying and the girls were misty-eyed. Sophocles had to bury his face in Kiawe's shoulder to hide his tears. They were all laughing gleefully as they broke apart, forming a semi-circle so Ash could see them all at once. "Damn Ash, you really  _ didn't  _ grow up, huh?" Kiawe grinned as they all wiped their faces to study him.

Ash sighed in mock frustration before grinning at the remark, "I told you I was cursed to be short forever." Pikachu cackled at that and jumped onto the Professor's shoulder to have him scratch his chin.

As the group was interrogating Ash about his travels, an unfamiliar girl approached them along with Mr. Mime, the two of them pulling their suitcases. The girl shook her head at Ash's carelessness as she noticed his bag laying on the ground a few feet away from him. "Ash Ketchum, I told you to slow down!" She scolded.

"Sorry sis, guess I was a bit too excited." He scratched the back of his head in embarrassment as his friends stared at the girl in confusion.

"That's alright. I really should be going soon, if I want to catch a cab that is. It'll be dark by the time I make it to the hotel." She glanced behind them at the slowly setting sun and let out a breath.

"But we just got here! Come on, can't you stay for just a little bit? You have to at least meet my friends!"

She shook her head with a small regretful smile, "Sorry Ash, but I-"

"I could give you a ride," Kukui suggested, adjusting his hat as he beamed at Ash and the girl. She looked surprised at his offer while Ash cheered happily.

"Oh no, that's alright, I wouldn't want to intrude on your time or anything."

"Nah, it's cool as a Blizzard! I can get you to the hotel in a split." The Professor grinned once more and she sighed in defeat.

Ash had already collected his bag off the ground and resumed his conversation as the girl talked to the Professor. "So you're Ash’s sister, yeah?"

She nodded and looked over at Ash, noticing the slump of his shoulders. His previous escapade sure did a number on him, and she was seeing the effects. "Yes, I’m Holly. Thank you so much for taking Ash in. Ash told me that if he moved here, he would take a break from his travels, and he needs rest right now more than ever." She straightened her posture when she noticed Kukui giving her an odd look and smiled. "I mean he's just been so busy, and he missed you all a lot, so I figured he could use a change."

“Where’s Delia?” He asked, noticing that their mother was nowhere to be found. Holly stiffened.

“Oh, uh she wasn’t able to come along. She’s fairly busy right now.”

He tilted his head slightly but didn't question her further. Something seemed to be off, but Kukui figured that Ash would tell him if there was a problem. He turned back to the teens and cleared his throat to get their attention. "Alrighty, well I think it's time you guys got home."

A series of disappointed 'aw's and 'but professor!'s followed suit, but he dismissed them with a shake of his head. "I might not be your father but I'm still your teacher, and I know when you guys need sleep. I'm sure there will be plenty of time to catch up tomorrow."

Once the teens had all dispersed to their way of transport, bidding each other goodnight, Kukui went to the Tauros taxi that had brought him there with Holly following. She glanced back at her brother questioningly when he stayed put. He also seemed to be staring at something out of her current line of sight. "Ash!" She called to him, but he didn't look at her.

"Yeah, I'll be there in a minute." He answered before walking off towards whatever he was looking at. Holly shrugged and slid into the wagon with Mr. Mime and Pikachu, petting them both contentedly.

Ash couldn't break eye contact, no matter how awkward it was to be staring straight at the older boy. He approached with furrowed brows and a slightly tilted head, frowning at the facial expression he got in return. "Hi." He spoke meekly when they were only about a foot apart, almost flinching when he heard how quiet his own voice was and the slight break in it.

"Hey," Gladion responded, his mouth in a thin line as he looked down at the considerably smaller trainer. Ash took a minute to take in Gladion's features, his sharp jawline and his lean but obvious muscles, and just  _ everything _ . Ash thought he looked good before, but now it was on another level. When he thought this, reality hit him like a brick and he blushed brightly as he realized he had been staring for way too long. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

"You haven't changed a bit, how are you still short?" Gladion broke the silence and he laughed when he placed a hand on Ash's head.

"Hey, don't do that! It's not fair that you're freakishly tall!" Ash shouted in embarrassment, playfully punching his companion in the chest, to which he was eye-level.

"Sorry-Sorry!" Gladion said between chuckles, Ash now giggling with him as well once his anger subsided. "Couldn't help myself, it was just too cute."

Ash thought he was going to explode at the compliment, his arms dropping and one of them coming to scratch at his thigh. His face burned as he cleared his throat, "You don't look so bad either."

Gladion paused as well and Ash mentally berated himself, ' _ What the hell are you thinking? You can't just say shit like that out of nowhere _ !'

To clear up the moment, Gladion coughed and rubbed the back of his head. "Well I um, guess I should let you go now..."

"Wait, why are you here? Did you come to greet me?" Ash looked up at him in newfound clarity, and he grinned when the blonde looked away sheepishly.

"Well, I was going to, but I didn't want to interrupt and you guys were already hugging so..." 

Ash rubbed the underside of his nose and laughed, "So you  _ are  _ here to see me!"

"I never said that!" It was now Gladion's turn to glare at him as Ash pointed up at him.

"Yes you did, I heard you say it!"

"Why  _ you _ !-" Gladion didn't get the chance to make his move and tickle Ash as the Professor yelled out Ash’s name.

"Ash, time to go!"

Ash sighed and adjusted his cap, casting a sweet smile up at the trainer before him. "I'll see you later, Gladion." He twisted to face the wagon but hesitated, biting his lip for a moment as if in thought before turning back and wrapping his arms tightly around Gladion's middle, burying his face in his chest. The taller boy took a small step back in surprise before returning the embrace, one of his hands going into Ash's hair and the other to his back. He inhaled the distinct honey scent of his raven hair and relaxed immediately. When Ash pulled away, they made eye contact for a couple of seconds, waved goodbye, and he hurried off to the wagon.

\-----

Ash glanced around the remodeled house from his position in the loft, taking note of how much larger the building was now that the Professors had expanded.

His bag lay forgotten by the loft’s ladder, but he was too tired to walk over to it and then change clothes, so he fell onto the same soft couch that he slept on during his first time in Alola and pulled a quilt over himself and Pikachu, who lay tucked between his arms.

Staring up blankly at the ceiling, the ravenette trainer submersed himself in his thoughts. He was glad to know that his friends didn't forget him, that they actually missed him and he was so warmly welcomed back. But something was just... off. Everyone was older now, and they all looked so grown-up despite only a few years difference. Even Sophocles had grown taller and shed a little weight, no doubt with the help of Kiawe. But why did he feel so completely out of place? They were still his friends, after all, family even. Then something occurred to him, something that stung his heart and built tears in his eyes.  _ Everything  _ had changed. Not just them, but Ash himself.

In an attempt to comfort himself, he focused his mind on what hasn't changed, his thoughts instantly rerouting to Gladion. He was still the same tough trainer with a heart of gold, at least that's how Ash saw him, and whenever he even simply looked at Ash, his stomach tied up in knots and his face felt hot with a blush. He wasn't really sure why these feelings had held up after almost three years of them being apart and it was a bit strange to think that their dynamic remained after being apart for so long, but he supposed it was always meant to be that way. What he did know was that he had missed the tall blonde just as much as he'd missed everyone else, if not more.

While still focused on all the people he had missed so dearly, Ash drifted off into a light, dreamless slumber.


	2. Honey and Emerald

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> going back to school has never been so sweet.

Ash woke up to the screeching sound of his alarm, stretching himself out on the plush couch with a tired sigh before fumbling to turn it off. He sat up as Pikachu drifted into consciousness beside him, his ears twitching as he glanced up at Ash.

"Morning Pikachu. Ready to visit the Pokemon School today?" He rubbed his eyes and smiled down at his Pokemon, pushing up off the couch and forcing himself to get dressed despite feeling exhausted. Pikachu yawned and curled back up beneath the blanket, waiting for Ash to get ready. ‘ _ Hm, I guess the Professor left already _ …’

The ravenette teen dug through his suitcase after pulling it over to the couch, opting for a thin navy blue hoodie and a pair of dark gray, cuffed sweatpants. Ash ignored the voice in the back of his head reminding him that it was spring in Alola, and would probably still be blazing hot outside. With a peek at the clock on his phone, he hurried into the bathroom to change and stuffed anything that he might need into his backpack. Pikachu had gone back to sleep, so Ash nudged him gently to wake him up, giggling at the electric mouse’s squeaky yawn. “Come on buddy, time to go.”

“Pika Pi…” Pikachu grumbled in feign annoyance before shaking off his sleepiness and hopping onto Ash’s shoulder, nuzzling into his trainer’s cheek. Ash scratched at the Pokemon’s chin in return, feeling his mood brighten just with Pikachu’s presence.

He ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to calm the fluffy locks, but realizing it was of no use, grabbed breakfast for Pikachu and rushed out the door, hardly remembering to lock it behind him. ‘ _ Oh please don't let me be late. _ ’ Ash looked once more at his phone, groaning at the time and walking a bit faster while also trying not to fall over. ' _ Probably should have eaten breakfast _ .’ He shrugged off his hunger and continued up the hard dirt path, almost breaking into a run when the school came into sight.

\-----

"There you are!" Lillie looked disappointedly at Ash as he struggled to catch his breath in the doorway to the classroom.

"Sorry I'm-" He inhaled sharply, holding his ribs while he tried to speak. "-late. Forgot to set an alarm." He lied, smiling sheepishly at the defeated shake of heads around the room.

Kiawe chuckled lightly, "Typical Ash."

"Oh hush it." Ash punched his arm in passing before sitting at his old desk. He shuffled his backpack off his shoulders and Pikachu hopped onto the wooden desk. The electric mouse blinked up at him, pushing his head against Ash's hand.

"Alola Ash, nice of you to join us." Kukui smiled warmly at him and gave his hoodie a once-over, a suspicious look flashing on his face for a moment before he began speaking. "As you all remember, Ash was the first-ever champion here in Alola, but he's been gone for quite a while, so I thought I'd let you guys train today and see if he still has the spirit to keep his title."

The group of friends cheered at the prospect of training for the day, and Kiawe was, of course, the first to challenge Ash to a battle. No doubt all of them had missed their days in the classroom and all of the time they spent together. It was obvious in the way that they lit up so brightly around each other, after all, they were the closest-knit friend group Ash had met. Of course, he was a part of it too, but he could never bring himself to fully open up to them, even after living in the Alola region for over a year. He was not the type to share his problems, always willing to put everyone before himself.

Ash had to dig himself out of his thoughts once he realized he was staring at Kiawe blankly. "There's no way I'll lose this time!"

"Oh really? We'll see about that! I'm not as rusty as you think I am!" Even as he said it, Ash didn't quite believe his own words. He wasn't rusty, that was for sure, but he was so distracted he wasn't sure if he could even walk down to the schoolyard, let alone battle someone effectively. Ignoring the throbbing in his head, he bolted out of the classroom with Kiawe. Ash would be damned if a little migraine was going to stop him from enjoying his first day back in Alola. His classmates quickly followed suit as well as the Professor, all yelling at him to slow down. 

When they reached the courtyard, there were classes of children out and about, playing games with each other and their Pokémon. Ash was hit with a bout of nostalgia, memories of his adventures with all of his friends during his visit to Alola resurfacing.

The battlefields were still the same trodden dirt from before he left, although it looked as though the lines were more refined, most likely painted over recently. Professor Kukui approached Ash with an affectionate shake of his head, holding out a tray of Pokeballs to the younger trainer. “I think your other partners would like to see you again.”

Ash gasped and hurriedly took the Pokeballs from the tray, throwing them up in the air while calling out the Pokemon contained inside. “Lycanroc, Incineroar, Rowlet, Melmetal!” He held his arms out only to be tackled to the ground by the four Pokemon, laughing as they all nuzzled him to show their excitement. “I missed you guys, but I need to breathe!” They quickly calmed down and let Ash pet them individually, relishing in the happiness that their faithful trainer brought them. Incineroar helped Ash to his feet and Lycanroc cuddled up close to his side, while Rowlet settled into Ash’s backpack like before and Melmetal sat on the ground behind Ash.

“Alright, Kiawe you’re on!” Ash felt his legs waver beneath him once he was standing still, and the blistering heat of spring in Alola was certainly not helping, but he had to retain his composure. He spread his legs slightly and bent his knees to keep his balance, inhaling deeply and ignoring the spots in his vision. ' _ Please just stay upright for a few more hours... _ '

\-----

Ash held onto his knees for stability while he hunched over, panting like a dog as sweat dripped off his face. ‘ _ God I’m out of shape. _ ’ He was grateful to finally be away from his friends, not that he didn’t want to be around them, but he needed a minute to breathe. They had spent all afternoon training, and Ash wasn’t sure how much longer he could go without passing out.

He was happy though, thinking back on today’s training filled him with pride in his friends. They were all so much stronger, even though half of them weren’t focused on their battling capabilities long term. Ash guessed some of their practice was a lasting result of his competitive streak since it seemed to push them all to train more every time Ash beat them in battle. Even Lillie, his once soft-spoken classmate, was more confident in herself. She had evolved Snowy, with the ice Pokemon’s consent of course, and even obtained a Fairium-Z along her Icium-Z. Ash was impressed, to say the least.

It was so heartwarming to see how much the group had grown together while Ash was away, though he wished he could have been there to see it.

“Hey Ash, you alright?” A familiar voice mumbled in his ear, causing Ash to yelp in surprise and jump back. He stumbled backward but was caught by Gladion, who laughed softly at his reaction and helped him stand up straight. A bright blush colored Ash’s cheeks as he made eye contact with the taller boy. The warm smile on the blonde’s face made his stomach twist up in knots and his head spin.

“H-Hey Gladion,” Ash swallowed thickly and tried his best to return the smile. “Yeah, I’m good, just been battling for a while so I needed a break I guess.”

Gladion gave him a quick once-over, his eyes catching on the hoodie Ash was wearing. “You’re wearing a hoodie in this weather? Guess I can’t talk though.” He chuckled and shook his head, adjusting the sleeves of his jacket. The two of them fell silent for a moment, staring into each other’s eyes until Gladion cleared his throat and Ash hurriedly looked away.

“Why did you come to the Pokemon School? Last time I checked you didn’t go here when we were younger.” The ravenette looked back up at him with a questioning expression and Gladion felt his heart catch in his throat.

_ ‘Jesus this kid is gonna be the death of me..’  _ He mentally shook his head to clear his thoughts. “Just came to see if you maybe wanted to get lunch, um together? Uh, I mean, after all, we have a lot of catching up to do.”

After a nerve-wracking pause, Ash grinned brightly at the offer, “Sure!” His immediate change in demeanor gave Gladion whiplash, but the older boy nodded in return and told Ash he would be waiting at the front gate.

‘ _ What is with him lately _ ?’ Gladion wondered, briefly glancing over his shoulder at Ash as he walked away. He promptly dismissed the thought for later so he could focus on where he was going, instead of tripping over his own feet and risking looking like an idiot.

Once Gladion disappeared around a corner, Ash sighed as the morning’s activities finally started to catch up with him. Despite his tiredness, he forced himself into the building to collect his things and say a temporary goodbye to his friends before leaving. “I’ll see you later guys, I’ll be back after lunch!” He waved at his companions and left after they all wished him farewell.

Ash met Gladion just outside the gate and they left together, walking so close to each other that their arms brushed with every step. They made light, unimportant conversation for a few minutes before settling into a comfortable silence. They let themselves simply enjoy the company and admire the glittering ocean as Pikachu napped in Ash’s bag.

Everything about it was familiar and made Ash feel safe, a kind of comfort that Ash now realized he’d been missing. Tears began to prickle at the corners of his chocolate eyes, his face reddening as he fought the sudden wave of emotions. ‘ _ So much has changed. Lillie and Mallow are together and help manage Mallow’s family’s restaurant, Kiawe is an Island Kahuna, Sophocles works at Aether Paradise as a scientist, and Lana collects rare water types and works at an aquarium. Not to mention, Lusamine was reunited with Professor Mohn, and Kukui and Burnet’s daughter was born! I wasn’t there for any of it… But they’re still the same people I loved back then, they’re still my family… _ ’

“Ash?” Gladion looked over at his companion, startled at the sight of tears on Ash’s cheeks. Ash turned abruptly and crushed his face into the blonde’s chest, sobbing into the dark fabric as Gladion tentatively wrapped his arms around his smaller frame. “Hey, it’s okay...”

Ash gripped the back of Gladion’s hoodie until his knuckles turned white, his mind screaming at him that if he let go he would lose him, lose  _ him, lose him _ … 

He finally glanced up at the blonde when he had calmed down a bit, wiping his face with the sleeve of his jacket and giving Gladion a broken smile. “Sorry, I-I don’t know what came over me, I just…”

“You don’t have to apologize. Are you alright?”

“I guess, yeah.” The ravenette noticed that Gladion’s arms were still wrapped around him, but instead of pulling away, he leaned in again to return the embrace, his arms barely meeting at Gladion’s back. “Can I have your number please?” He asked, blushing furiously in embarrassment as he avoided looking up.

Gladion chuckled at the soft-spoken question and Ash felt his chest vibrate with the sound. “Of course.” Once the two had separated, they exchanged numbers and continued their walk to the restaurant, keeping the least amount of distance between them as possible. Pikachu had woken up at some point as well, climbing up onto Ash’s shoulder and listening to the boy’s light-hearted conversation. The electric mouse seemed to sense something was wrong with Ash, obvious in the way he kneaded his paws soothingly on Ash’s shoulder.

“Alright, so are you finally going to let me pay?” Ash chuckled lightly, side-eyeing the blonde.

“Of course not! Last time I checked, you don’t have a job.” Gladion smirked, ruffling Ash’s hair. The ravenette shoved at Gladion’s shoulder with a laugh, the last traces of his awful mood dissipating with their banter.


	3. Life's a Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a warm welcome is best given at a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its finally here!! oh arceus i hope you guys like this and i hope it was worth the wait. i've already started on chapter 4 so hopefully it'll be out soon!!!

From Gladion's position on his bed, he could see that it was unusually cloudy outside, especially since just the day before the sun was glaring down at the islands intensely. He sighed and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before stretching his arms above his head, letting them fall and hang over the top of the bed with a groan. _‘For Arceus’ sake, what time is it…’_

“Gladion, get up!” Lillie began knocking on his door obnoxiously, startling him out of the bed. He stalked over to the door and it swung open as he was about to open it, the corner colliding with his nose painfully.

"Augh!" Gladion covered his nose as he stumbled backward, knocking into the edge of his bed and falling onto the floor with a groan. "Fuck that hurts.." He grumbled in irritation as he blinked tears out of his eyes, feeling a bit light-headed. Silvally walked to Gladion’s side at the sound of his pain, letting out an inquisitive grunt to check on the trainer. Gladion reassured the Pokemon that he was okay before it got all worked up.

Lillie gasped and rushed to where her brother sat on the floor, "Oh Gladion I'm so sorry! I didn't know you were right there." She tried to reach out and get a better look but he carefully pushed her hand away and sighed.

"It's okay, just... Let me open the door next time." He flinched as he moved his hand away from his face, glaring at the blood on his fingers. He lightly swiped under his nose to remove some more of it.

"Right! Do you need a tissue?" She wrinkled her nose at the sight of the blood and hurried to his connected bathroom to retrieve some tissues for him. "Here.” She held out the soft tissues and glanced at the loyal Silvally, petting his shiny fur to calm him. “By the way, Ash's welcome home party is today!" Lillie smiled at her brother excitedly.

Gladion's eyes widened and he inwardly groaned. _'Maybe I should've stayed in bed.'_

\-----

Gladion popped open the umbrella as he stepped out of the limo, helping his sister out of the low vehicle once he had turned around. She closed the door behind herself and sighed as she looked out at the rain, a disappointed pout on her lips. Gladion mumbled, "At least we won't have to stand out in the heat all day."

"Easy for you to say, brother! It's so humid my hair is getting frizzy." She crossed her arms as they walked up to the school, making Gladion chuckle at her complaining. It made his nose hurt though, so he stopped and instead wore a small smirk. Lillie hit him on the arm lightly in retaliation as they passed through the doors.

"Lillie!" Before Gladion had even closed the umbrella, his sister was engulfed in a hug from Mallow. While the green-haired girl squeezed the life out of her blonde girlfriend, Gladion shuffled off to the side of everyone and listened silently while the teens discussed the party preparations.

The professor started by saying who would be responsible for what. "Lillie and Lana, you two will be in charge of decorations. Mallow, your dad is supposed to be coming with the cake, but until then Kiawe will fly you to the market so you can pick up some snacks. Sophocles and Gladion, you two can clean and set up the table and chairs."

Sophocles whined about having to clean while Gladion glanced around the lobby, which they had decided the party would be held in. "Why do we get stuck with the cleaning?! Why couldn't Mallow and Kiawe have done it, they're better at this than I am anyways!"

Gladion rolled his eyes playfully at the shorter boy's protests and thought about where they should start. "We should sweep and mop first." He interrupted Sophocles, earning a stunned stare from the boy as if he didn't expect the taller blonde to speak.

"O-Oh yeah, I guess we should." Sophocles blushed in embarrassment and had Gladion follow him to the janitor's closet. He handed Gladion the mop and its matching yellow bucket, as well as a container of blue soap, telling him to go to the kitchen to fill the bucket. He nodded and hoped he could find the said kitchen, but of course, he had only been in the school a handful of times so he doubted he would.

 _'Today is gonna be a long day, huh?...'_ He thought, rounding another corner identical to all the others in the building, sighing when he realized he was no closer to finding the kitchen.

\-----

Ash glared at the glowing of his phone screen and turned over on the couch, ignoring the incessant buzzing from the device. He hadn't even been awake for an hour and he had already gotten a countless amount of texts from someone. He didn't even bother checking who it was, instead choosing to stay in bed and not answer. Whenever he had woken up, his gut immediately told him it was going to be a bad day. There wasn't a specific reason for it, he just couldn't find the energy or motivation to move. He sighed into the couch cushions and let his thoughts drift.

_ His sister had decided that it was finally time for them to move after what happened, for whatever reason, so Ash suggested the one place he had missed so dearly. He wasn't sure why his attachment to Alola was stronger than other regions, it's not as though some life-changing events had occurred there and lasting trauma that he would never forget... Okay, so maybe Ash could think of a few reasons, but they weren’t exactly positive. Maybe it was the people? He knew he missed them, especially since they were practically family, but he didn't think they were the only thing that kept his heart on the islands. _

Emerald orbs appeared for a moment, but he quickly shook the image out of his mind and sat up. 

_'Okayyy, and that's my queue to get up.'_

Pikachu stirred awake with Ash's movement and squealed as he stretched on the boy's legs, his ears twitching with renewed energy. "Did you sleep well, buddy?" Ash smiled adoringly at the electric mouse, who nodded happily and rubbed his head against Ash's now outstretched hand. "Good, I'm glad." The ravenette stood on stiff legs and stretched as well, yawning in the process. The straining made him light-headed, so he stood there for a second and blinked away the spots in his vision. His vision still a bit blurry, he stumbled over to his suitcase and pulled out a random pair of black cargo shorts, as well as a red, thin, long-sleeved shirt. He then pulled on some white socks as well as black and white sneakers.

He paused for a moment and stared into the open suitcase, his eyes landing on a thick red band that was tucked between his clothes. A faint grin curved his lips as he reached out, running his fingers along the length of the metal bracelet adoringly. With a bit of hesitation, he took it out of the bag and slid it onto his pale wrist, admiring it. He felt as though a weight lifted off of his chest once he put it on, so he decided to keep it on. (Maybe forever if it was always going to make him feel like that.)

"Ash, are you awake?" Professor Burnet appeared in the doorway to her and Kukui’s bedroom, and Ash shoved his hands deep into his pockets, hoping she wouldn't notice how flustered he was. "Oh, there you are." Burnet gave him a soft smile and walked over to him, brushing some of his messy black hair out of his face. ‘ _Like my mother_ …’ She mumbled something about a haircut but Ash just rolled his eyes playfully and tried to change the subject.

"What are you doing today Burnet?"

She chuckled, ready to answer, when a little girl bounded out of the bedroom from behind her, giggling and running around the kitchen with an astonishing amount of energy. “Daisy, calm down, you’re going to get hurt!” 

Ash looked at the child with wide eyes, crouching down to be eye-level with the girl as she froze in front of him. “So you’re Daisy, huh?” He couldn’t contain the smile on his face as he looked into her large brown eyes. “You look just like your mom!”

Noticing that the little girl looked at a loss for words, Burnet decided to introduce them. “Daisy dear, this is Ash, remember me telling you about him? He was the first champion here in Alola!”

Daisy seemed to process the information fairly quickly and gasped up at Ash, her eyes glittering with wonder, “So you’re my big brother! I can call you big brother right?!” She leaped forward and squeezed his torso in a bone-crushing hug.

“Whoa! You’re pretty strong, aren’t ya?” Ash returned the hug with less force, admiring the little girl’s energy. “Yeah, you can call me big brother, as long as I get to call you little sis!” He tickled Daisy after his remark and relished in the sound of her laughter.

Burnet was pleased to see the two of them connecting so fast, but she had to remind herself that they all had a busy day ahead of them. “Come on now little Petal, we need to get going, and I’m sure Ash has somewhere to be too.” She glanced between the said boy and the loft, where his phone was dinging non-stop.

“We’ll be back later, have a good day Ash!” Burnet called to him as she pulled Daisy out of the door, popping open their umbrella once fully out on the porch.

“Bye-bye big brother!”

“Bye Burnet, bye Daisy!” Once the door shut, Ash sighed and finally decided to check his phone, his eyes widening at the number of notifications on his lock screen.

Unlocking his phone led him to see 12 missed calls and 41 unread text messages, at which he groaned. Clicking first on his message app, he saw that all of his friends were spamming him and asking if he was awake yet and that there was an emergency at the Pokemon School. His heart rate picked up when he read that, so he began gathering his bag and Pokeballs, prepared for a fight. He rushed out the door, checking the last of his notifications before beginning to run to the school, ignoring the grumbling in his stomach and the pouring rain. Pikachu wasn't sure what was wrong, but he followed Ash closely, just as worried as his trainer.

Running up the hill was a hassle but Ash couldn't care less at that moment. The only thoughts running through his head were what could have possibly happened. It made him want to cry just thinking about it, but he held it in so he could see where he was going. When he burst through the main doors of the school, all of the lights promptly flicked on and his friends cheered around a large decorated table. Ash's attention darted around the room, taking in all of the decorations, food, and balloons. "What..."

"Welcome home Ash!" They all yelled excitedly and launched confetti poppers above his head, the loud bursts making his ears ring. He looked like a Deerling in headlights, frozen just inside the doorway of the school, soaked with rain and trembling from the cold and fear he felt just seconds before. When his brain finally caught up with what was happening around him, his mouth twisted into a weak smile and he let out a broken sob. His friends surrounded him, cooing apologies and telling him it was okay. He let himself cry into their arms, waves of relief crashing over him.

“I-I thought that..” Ash sniffled and began wiping at his face frantically, still hiccuping with small sobs as he tried to compose himself. “I thought you guys were hurt or something.” Saying it made him cry more, although it mixed with laughter as they all reassured him nothing was wrong. He finally calmed down when Kukui cleared his throat to get everyone’s attention.

The professor smiled warmly at Ash. “Welcome home, bud. Sorry for all the spam, everyone was a little impatient and you weren’t answering your phone-”

Ash cut him off, shaking his head a bit. “It’s okay, don’t worry about it. What is all this for?” He looked around the room once more, finally realizing that it was a welcome home party. He rubbed away the wetness around his eyes to see all of the decorations better. “Oh, guys, you didn’t have to.” He grinned.

“Of course we did, Ash! You’re an important part of the group.” Mallow nudged his arm before turning around towards the kitchen, motioning for the rest of the group to follow. “We’ll be right back, just stay right there!” She called over her shoulder.

Ash stood around awkwardly for a moment in the now empty room. He hesitantly stepped up to the long table to see what food they had prepared, but his head snapped up from observing when he heard a door opening. Gladion stepped out, a large fluffy towel and what seemed to be a change of clothes in his arms. Ash felt his breath catch in his throat, a blush rising to his cheeks. The blonde boy approached him with a nervous smile, stopping only a couple of feet away from him, gently setting the towel and clothes on a nearby chair. “Welcome home.” He opened his arms, inviting Ash into a hug, and Ash would be damned if he didn’t accept. He melted into the taller man’s arms, his face buried in the warm planes of his chest. He smelled like expensive cologne, and something distinctly _Gladion._ Ash felt like he could live the rest of his life curled into that comforting scent, but he forced himself to disconnect from Gladion when a shiver racked his body, reminding him of how cold his wet clothes were. Also, his face was a bit hot from being so close to the boy, but he pushed that thought to the side to process later. Gladion chuckled shyly at the silence and handed Ash the pile of fabric he had set on the chair. “Here, sorry if they don’t fit, we couldn't figure out what size to get.” He rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish smile.

Ash giggled weakly and was careful not to hold the dry clothes too close to his body. “Thanks. Hey, what happened to your nose?” Ash noticed the small bandage and the red bruising on the older boy’s nose and instinctively reached out to touch it. Gladion flinched slightly, but seeing the hurt look that flashed on Ash’s face made him move his face forward just a bit so that Ash’s fingers gently touched his nose.

“I got hit by a door, it’s nothing.” Gladion spoke in a breathless whisper as he stared into Ash’s honey-colored eyes. Ash nodded, seemingly accepting his answer, and let his arm drop to his side slowly.

They then sat in silence for a bit, causing Ash’s head to overflow with thoughts and feelings that he tried oh-so-hard to ignore. Suddenly, Gladion’s eyes flickered down to Ash’s wrist and a look of recognition and _something else_ crossed his sharp features.

“Is that… My old Z-Ring?” The blonde mumbled, his green eyes wide with surprise.

Ash stumbled over his words so much that he thought he was going to faint. “I, well I- I mean yeah, yeah I… I couldn’t just throw it away after you gave it to me…” He let out a heavy breath after he finally finished his sentence and stared, embarrassed, at the floor.

Gladion couldn’t contain the disbelieving laugh building in his chest as he reached out to hold Ash’s wrist. He stared down at the bracelet, admiring how beautifully it clashed with Ash’s unusually pale skin. With that thought, Gladion took a quick scan of Ash’s body, startled by just how different he looked, almost sickly. ‘ _How did I not notice before? What happened to him?_ ’ He hid his surprise well though, not wanting to ruin the moment. Ash looked up at him and held his breath.

“It looks nice on you.” Gladion spoke in a hushed tone before turning on his heel and exiting the room. Ash stood in shock for a few moments before he shivered again, his body reminding him that he should really go change clothes. 

‘ _What was that…_ ’ Ash pondered, his stomach twisting with some warm, foreign feeling.

\-----

Ash stacked his dirty plate on top of the others, holding his stomach with his other hand and groaning at the ache in it. “I think I ate too much cake…” He sighed and hung his head as all of his friends agreed.

Kukui chuckled at his graduated student’s antics as he hauled the plates off to the kitchen. “Alright everybody, cleanup is all done! It’s getting late so you should all get going if you want to be home before it’s too dark.” All of the teens stood from their chairs and began saying their tired goodbyes. Ash was the last one in the building since he stayed behind once he realized he’d lost his phone. “Go on ahead guys, I’ll just be a minute.” He reassured all of his Pokemon partners, and they bounded out of the doors towards Kukui’s house.

“Hey Ash, can I talk to you before you go?” Ash was crouched by the table, his eyes searching under the large piece of furniture for his phone. He peeked over his shoulder to see Kukui standing with his arms crossed, a worried look on his face. Ash could feel his throat closing up due to his rising internal panic, and his breathing seemed to be suddenly shallow as he stood up stiffly.

“Yes, Professor?” He coughed a bit to clear his throat and glanced up at the older man. ‘ _Oh Arceus please don’t make me do this, please I don’t want him to know, not like this-_ ’

Kukui approached Ash cautiously, watching his body language for any signs that he was going to run off. “Ash, what happened?”

“Wh-What happened? Haha oh, you mean what am I looking for, oh it’s just I lost my phone you see-”

“Ash.” Kukui fixed the boy with a hard stare, pointedly looking at Ash’s long sleeves with concern. “What happened when you left?...”

Ash didn’t even realize as he started crying, his body curling in on itself and making him look fragile. He dug his nails into his arms unconsciously as sobs wracked his body, making his chest heave with interrupted breaths. Kukui didn’t hesitate in hugging him tightly, his paternal instincts immediately screaming at him to comfort the younger man, considering Ash was practically his adopted child. “Breathe, son, breathe.”

Ash couldn’t even process that Kukui had called him his son, as his mind basically shut off and he failed to process his emotions. It was like all of his feelings slammed into him with full force, all at once, and he crumbled to the floor still in the Professor’s arms. He buried his face into Kukui’s pristine white lab coat in a futile effort to hide away from the world. He just wanted to sink into the man’s warm embrace and never return. Anything to get him away from all of his misery.

Kukui wasn’t sure what to do, but he knew that if Ash kept crying like he was he’d nearly suffocate himself. He gently pulled Ash’s head away from his chest and rubbed at the boy’s shoulders, “Ash, come on buddy I know you can hear me. I need you to look at me, yeah? You have to breathe, Ash.” He wiped at Ash’s face, both to clear some of the fast-flowing tears and to try and soothe the boy. “Look at me, you can do it.”

Ash seemed to hear him, although he was still hiccuping with broken sobs. He stared up at the Professor with glossy eyes, biting his lip in a failed effort to quiet himself when he noticed just how loud his crying was. “Hey bud, it’s okay. Deep breaths okay, do it with me. In…” Kukui held eye contact as he instructed Ash, listening to the boy’s shaky inhale. “And out.”

After a few minutes of deep breathing and the occasional aftershock sob, Ash had finally calmed down enough to where Kukui could grab him some tissues. As soon as the Professor returned, Ash wiped at his face until most of the wetness was gone, sniffling thickly to clear up his nose. “I-I’m sorry…”

“Oh Ash, don’t apologize.” He smiled sadly at Ash’s broken voice. “Come on, let’s go home.” Kukui helped him to his feet carefully and wrapped an arm around his middle to keep him upright.

“I- My phone…” Ash mumbled tiredly, remembering that he had lost it.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll find it tomorrow and give it to you.” Kukui walked out of the building with Ash by his side, moving his hand up to the boy’s shoulder once he was able to walk okay. ‘ _You’ll be okay, I promise_.’


	4. What's Fun Without a Little Dress-Up?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyone needs a little fun in their life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you guys enjoy this!!! i didn't even realize how much i had written so enjoy two 3000+ word chapters in a row <3

Ash shifted around on the sofa, unable to find a comfortable position that his half-asleep brain would accept. Groaning in defeat, he reluctantly opened his eyes, regretting the decision immediately when light from the loft’s window shone directly on his face. To hide from the blinding light he turned over and buried his face into Lycanroc’s mane, cuddling up to the rock-type’s surprisingly soft fur with a delighted purr. Lycanroc seemed to enjoy the affection as he delicately nuzzled his trainer in return.

“Morning Lycanroc,” Ash mumbled into the white mass of fur, sighing contentedly. Pikachu suddenly climbed over Ash’s side and joined his trainer and Lycanroc with a happy squeak, rubbing his nose against Ash’s cheek. “Morning Pikachu.” Ash reached out blindly to pet his partner Pokemon with a light giggle.

“Ash, breakfast!” A voice called from somewhere below him, but Ash grumbled in protest to moving anymore and hid further beneath his blankets. “Daisy, go see if your brother is awake for me, will you?”

“Yes, momma!” Ash was curious as to why someone began climbing up the loft ladder toward him, so he turned back over slowly to see. When he peeked open his eyes, he was met with the sight of Daisy’s face mere inches away from his own. “Good morning, big brother!” Her voice startled him awake and he sat up quickly, almost colliding heads with the little girl hovering over him. His sudden movements also alerted Lycanroc, who immediately jumped in front of him in a defensive panic, snarling at Daisy with its crimson glare.

“Arceus, Daisy, you scared me!” Ash deflated and pet Lycanroc to calm him, smiling slightly as the hound Pokemon realized his mistake and whined as an apology. “It’s okay Lycanroc, it’s not your fault.” Ash reassured him before standing up on unsteady legs. Daisy beamed up at him with a childish grin before hurrying back downstairs, practically bouncing with energy. Ash was willing to admit that he was a little jealous of her ability to be so energetic.

Ash forced himself to stand, with a bit of help from Lycanroc, and lazily climbed down the ladder with his Pokemon in tow. He released Incineroar and Melmetal from their Pokeballs so they could eat as well before walking into the kitchen. “Morning dear, ready for some food?” Burnet chuckled at Ash’s obvious tiredness.

“Yes please.” He mumbled, rubbing at his eyes as he took his seat at their new dining table. Daisy sat across from him, coloring in a Pokemon coloring book with a set of crayons. She glanced up at Ash as he sat down with a curious tilt of her head.

“Big brother, what’s happened to your arms?”

Suddenly the room felt too small and Ash glanced down in fear, only to be met with the sight of bandages covering both of his forearms. He sighed and smiled awkwardly at Daisy. ‘ _When did those get there_?’

Burnet looked horrified at her daughter’s question and interrupted before Ash had to answer. “Daisy, what did I tell you about those questions?! Ash, I’m sorry… Daisy, apologize to him right now!”

“I’m sorry big brother…”

Ash chuckled lightly, “It’s okay, really.” He stared down at the table, feeling a little ashamed when he realized that Kukui must have told Burnet.

“Here, Alolan pancakes, your favorite.” Burnet placed a plate of pancakes in front of Ash and rubbed at the boy’s upper back comfortingly. He smiled up at her gratefully before she turned back to grab Daisy’s plate.

“Morning everyone!” Kukui emerged from downstairs and went to help Burnet so they could all sit and eat together.

“Hi daddy!” Daisy chirped happily around her bite of pancakes. Kukui chuckled at his little girl’s silliness, playfully scolding her for speaking with her mouth full. She apologized before going back to eating, humming happily at the taste of her food. “These pancakes are sooo good momma!”

“Thank you Petal.” Burnet smiled graciously at Daisy as she tried her own pancakes. Kukui began eating his as well and had to agree with his daughter’s praise of the sweet cakes. Ash moved his food around a bit before taking a bite and brightening at the taste.

Kukui glanced at Ash out of the corner of his eye, looking regretfully at the bandages. ‘ _I wish I could do more for you_ …’

Once the family was finished eating, Kukui gathered the plates and placed them in the dishwasher for later. He turned to see Ash already climbing his way back up the loft sluggishly, along with Lycanroc. Burnet took Daisy to their room to get her ready for the day, and Kukui decided to follow after Ash. “Hey, bud. How- um, how are your arms?”

Ash startled at the sudden voice behind him and Lycanroc reacted in tandem, jumping to stand in front of his trainer with a low growl. Once again Ash reached out to soothe the Pokemon. “Sorry Professor, Lycanroc has been acting this way all morning, I don’t know why.” He looked up at Kukui with an apologetic sigh before remembering he had been asked a question. “Oh, and they’re okay, I… I guess I have some explaining to do.”

“It’s okay if you aren’t ready, Ash-”

“No, you deserve to know. Plus, maybe getting it off my chest will, I dunno, make me feel better?” He seemed to be talking to himself by the end of his sentence, trying to assure himself that it was a good idea. After a brief pause, Ash took a steadying breath. “I guess it kind of started right before I left Alola… I got a call from Holly, asking me to come home as soon as I could. I had already planned on going home to visit on the break, so I agreed, but then she told me that Mom was sick.” He choked back tears as he held onto Lycanroc to ground himself, sitting on the floor of the loft so he wouldn’t fall over. “They- they couldn’t figure out what was wrong. She was in the hospital when I got back, so I went to see her as soon as I could, and I stayed with her for a while. But she kept getting worse… and I-” He broke into a crying fit and hid his face in Lycanroc’s fur, earning a sympathetic whine from the hound. Kukui sat on the floor next to the younger trainer and patted his back softly. Ash tried his best to get his breathing under control so he could continue. When he felt his throat beginning to close, he decided to just get it over with.

“She didn’t make it.” He curled in on himself at his own words and lost all of his composure, pulling Lycanroc closer and alerting his other Pokemon with a loud cry. Pikachu appeared in an instant, shoving himself between Ash and Lycanroc to nuzzle up to Ash’s chest. Incineroar and Rowlet were quick to follow while Melmetal watched them with a sad expression from the ladder. Ash couldn’t contain the pain in his voice as he blabbered on about what he should’ve done differently and how shitty he felt about not being there for her last day. Kukui simply let him ramble, offering up an occasional reassurance like ‘It’s okay, let it out.’

\-----

“Be careful out there Ash, don’t forget your umbrella!” Ash rolled his eyes playfully as Kukui called out from somewhere behind him. He opened the front door and made sure to pick up the blue umbrella in the holder next to him. Pikachu nestled himself between his shoulder and his hood, purring at the warmth. “Lycanroc, are you sure you don’t want to be in your Pokeball?” The trainer glanced down at the rock-type with a raised brow, surprised to see Lycanroc nod and nuzzle against his leg. “Alright, but don’t blame me if you get wet.”

“Roc-roc!”

Ash started his trek into town, opting to walk on the grass instead of on the dirt-trodden paths which were currently muddy from the rain. Lycanroc made sure to nudge Ash’s leg whenever he was spacing out and was about to step in a puddle. Ash was thankful for the Pokemon’s concern, but he couldn’t get his mind off of how he was acting that morning. It wasn’t abnormal for his partners to be a bit protective, especially since he had been gone for so long and they all missed him, but something wasn’t right. Lycanroc had never been aggressive to other trainers, especially not the Professor or Daisy. Ash guessed it could have had something to do with what happened the night before, but just as he was going to ask Lycanroc about it, he realized he had made it to the indoor market. Walking inside was immediately overwhelming, there were crowds of people in every section of the store, all talking over each other. He closed the umbrella and placed it in the plastic cover that came with it so that he wouldn't get water everywhere. Lycanroc was on alert, with his fur visibly ruffled and his eyes narrowed. Ash threaded his fingers through the rock type’s soft fur and smiled down at him, pleased when he saw Lycanroc relax with his touch. Pikachu climbed out onto Ash’s shoulder and pointed in the direction of fresh-smelling berries. “Alright, we can look really quick, but then we have to find Holly.” He giggled.

\-----

“There you are, Ash.” Holly was panting slightly while she glared at her younger brother disappointedly, a little annoyed that she had gone through what felt like a million crowded stores just to find the raven-haired trainer.

“Oh hi Holly, sorry we got a little distracted… Why are you breathing so heavy?” He looked up at her with innocent hazel eyes and she deflated, unable to stay mad at him.

“It’s fine, and don’t worry about it.” She turned away from Ash to glance around the store they were in, only to see that it was a clothing store, more specifically a boutique. “Uh, Ash, why did you come in here?”

A rosy blush covered his cheekbones and he swallowed thickly, turning his head to hide his embarrassment from Holly’s probing stare. “Well I- I mean I just saw this uh… This um, this necklace!” He panicked and chose to pick up the closest item to him, a delicate silver chain with a small piece of crystal hanging from it. The crystal was wrapped in a silver wire which curled at the ends. Although he had only chosen it because it was on a display right next to him, when looking at it closer he had to admit that it was pretty. Holly raised a disbelieving eyebrow at him and, realizing that he couldn’t fool her, he sighed in defeat. “Promise you won’t think I’m weird?” He looked down to the floor and shuffled his feet nervously. Holly moved forward a bit and patted his back reassuringly.

“Of course.”

“I… I was wondering if I could try on a dress?” He mumbled and held his breath, squeezing his eyes shut as he waited for her to yell at him or call him gross. He was surprised to hear her chuckling and looked up to see her rubbing her finger beneath her nose, smiling when he recognized the gesture. ‘ _Well, she’s definitely my sister_.’

Holly beamed at him when she lowered her hand. “That was too cute, how could I say no?! Plus, I don’t care what you want to try on as long as you’re happy.” She jabbed him playfully with her elbow and dragged him further into the store, taking the necklace from him after he told her that he actually really liked it.

The two siblings ended up leaving the boutique after almost 2 hours of shopping, both of them walking out of the store with their arms full of bags. They had also gone to a few other stores, mostly looking for shoes and accessories. Holly was glad to see Ash so relaxed and laughing as they bantered back and forth, just like they did when they were kids.

Ash fiddled with the necklace around his neck, admiring the shine of the crystal beneath the sunlight that was now filtering through the ceiling windows of the shopping mall. Suddenly he gasped and stopped walking, placing his bags on the ground swiftly and searching all of his pockets for his phone. “Oh my Arceus, what time is it?!” Holly stopped as well and pulled out her phone.

“It’s like 1, why?”

“I’m so sorry, I have to go! I’m supposed to meet with the girls at Lillie’s estate in 15 minutes.” Ash was rambling as he hurriedly collected all of his bags and called out Incineroar to help him carry some of them. Lycanroc took one of the smaller bags as well so that Ash only had a couple, and had one of his hands free. “I’m so so sorry Holly, I promise I’ll-”

“Ash, calm down! Come on, I’ll take you there.” She pulled him out of the mall with his Pokemon in tow, quickly calling over a Tauros Taxi and having Ash tell the driver the estate’s address. They all climbed into the wagon and Ash thanked Holly and the driver profusely as they arrived at the estate just in time. Ash, Incineroar, Lycanroc, and Pikachu all hopped out with the shopping bags and walked up to the mansion, with Ash greeting Hobbes at the towering entrance. “Hello, Hobbes!

“Well, Master Ash, it’s so great to see you again!” Hobbes gave the younger man a kind smile and welcomed him into the lobby, leading him through the halls to Lillie’s bedroom.

“You're finally here, Ash!” Lillie grinned brightly at him as he stepped through the doorway, with Mallow and Lana by her side. The two other girls looked up from their phones and smiled at him as well. Ash waved at the three girls as Hobbes took the bags from him and his Pokemon at Lillie’s request. The butler set the bags down by the door and left the room so the four of them could talk.

As soon as the older man had disappeared and closed the doors, the three girls instantly gave Ash a bone-crushing hug, making the boy squeak in surprise.

“I-I can’t breathe!” He giggled nervously and pulled his head back slightly while trying to return the embrace. The trio stepped back and gave him room, but Lillie brushed her hands over the bandages on Ash’s arms. “Oh, he told you, didn’t he?...” Realization dawned on him as he glanced between the women.

They didn’t say anything but they nodded, concerned but loving expressions on their faces. Ash nodded as well and ran a hand through his hair, “It’s okay, can we just… Hang out? I don’t really want to think about it.”

“Of course.” Lana agreed as they all gave Ash space. After a beat of silence, Mallow spoke up.

“So Ash, how was shopping?” The green-haired trainer smirked at the bags, familiar with the logo on the ones from the boutique. His face flushed as she dug through one of them, pulling out a short, flowy, light blue dress and showed it off to the other two girls. They gasped before looking over at Ash, who was currently hiding his face in his hands.

“It’s so cute! Ohhh, please try it on Ash, we want to see it!” Lillie squealed in excitement and waved her arms around as she begged him to put it on.

“Okay okay! Where am I supposed to change?”

Mallow walked back over to him and handed him the bundle of fabric along with one of his new pairs of shoes and a silver bracelet to match his necklace. Lillie led him to the bathroom connected to her room and shut the door behind him, making him jump. He sighed and stared down at the dress regretfully. “Great…”

He emerged a few minutes later, adjusting the bottom of the dress with a deep blush, avoiding eye contact as the girls all fawned over him. He was surprised at how comfortable it was, although he guessed he should have known that when he tried it on in the store, but the tag had been poking him in the side so it was a little distracting. The shoes were also nice tan sandals with white detailing, and the jewelry was a good match.

When he met Lillie’s eyes he could see a mischievous sparkle in them, and he immediately groaned. “What is it?”

“Please let us do your makeup!” The three of them asked in unison and Ash swore his eyes were going to pop out of his head. He caved fairly easily, however, after being bombarded with three sets of pleading Rockruff-eyes.

Ash was seated at the vanity and just as Lillie applied the finishing touches to his makeup, a knock at the door startled all of them out of their light conversation. The doors creaked open and Ash looked horrified as he made eye contact with Lusamine. ‘ _Oh Arceus, save me_.’

“Lunchtime ladies- Ash, is that you?!” Lusamine’s smile dropped into a shocked expression as she took in the younger man’s appearance. “Oh dear, what did they do to you?” She covered her mouth with her hand to hide her laugh before grinning at Ash. “That dress is cute,” was all she said before she walked off, letting the door shut behind her. Ash could feel the burning of his cheeks worsen when the embarrassment finally set in.

“Yay, time for lunch!” Mallow giggled and dragged Ash out of the room by his hand, Lillie and Lana quickly following. Ash felt as though he had whiplash from just how fast the day had gone so far.

\-----

“Arceus, Lillie, I don’t want to meet your dad for the first time looking like this!” Ash whispered harshly to his friend, hiding with her in the kitchen so everyone in the dining room couldn’t see him.

“You’ll be fine Ash! He’s not going to think you’re weird or anything.” Lillie tried giving him a reassuring smile but Ash just looked unimpressed.

“Lillie, I look like a doll that just crawled out of a coffin!” He grumbled and gestured to his pale skin and bandaged arms. Lillie grimaced at the comparison before sucking in a sharp breath.

“Look, Ash, I promise you that everything will be fine. Just don’t overthink it and you’ll be fine. Now, come on!” She had to pull him out of the kitchen by force and into the dining room where everyone was standing around chatting. Lillie tapped her mother and father on the shoulders and they turned around, both grinning happily at the sight of their daughter.

“Hello, princess- Oh, who’s this?” Mohn’s attention was redirected to Ash, who stood stiffly by Lillie’s side and nervously played with the crystal around his neck.

“This is Ash, the trainer I told you about, he won the first Alola League.” She introduced the two and Ash thought he was going to pass out when he shook the man’s hand, his legs shaking furiously beneath him. Lillie forced him into a conversation with her parents, and although Ash was still sweating a bit, he allowed himself to relax when Mohn didn’t seem to even notice his appearance.

Ash gave Lillie a side-eyed glare as she suddenly excused herself and walked away, earning a cheeky smile from the girl in return as she typed something out on her phone.

——-

Gladion stared at the photo in stunned silence, swallowing thickly as his brain processed the short dress and Ash’s makeup. ‘ _Like it_? >:3’

Gladion never thought he’d be receiving a text like that from Lillie of all people, but he wasn’t exactly complaining. ‘ _Tell him he looks good_.’


	5. Treasures of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some treasures aren't something you can see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i just updated a couple of days ago, but i was too excited to post this chapter, so here's an early treat!

Ash pulled the large hat down further, leaning his head down to look at his phone so he had a way to cover his face. He was grateful that Lana had taken his makeup off, but he wasn’t in the mood for weird stares from people he didn’t know so naturally he asked Lillie for one of her hats. He was startled out of his mindless scrolling by the squeals of his friends as they arrived at their destination. “Yes, we’re finally here!” Ash looked up at the sound of Lana’s excitement to see that they had dragged him all the way to Alola Sunrise. Lana was already inside by the time he realized where they were. Pikachu tilted his head and looked up at Ash, glaring at the hat that prevented him from sitting in his usual spot on Ash’s shoulder. Ash peered down at him and picked him up, petting him apologetically as the electric type pawed at the borrowed accessory.

“Come on, Ash!” Lillie tightened her hold on Mallow’s hand as she led her girlfriend into the building, and Ash followed just behind them.

The young man glanced around the store curiously, noticing that the building had obviously been expanded to accommodate more customers than before. There was a large number of displays filled with various jewelry all spread across the store, as well as a few scattered clothing racks and a newly built treat counter. Ash walked up to one of the tables and admired a box of glittering rings, noticing one in particular that reminded him of his mother’s wedding ring.

Delia had shown the ring to Ash a few times when he was younger while telling him stories about his father, even letting him try it on his tiny fingers just for fun. The small glittering stone and the intricate silver band always took his breath away every time he saw it up close. It was one of the only things his mother had left when his father passed away.

Ash remembered the last time he had visited Delia in her hospital room. _He was clutching her hand so tightly she had joked that he might break it, which scared him so much that he let go altogether, apologizing as if it had actually happened. Delia had reached out and cupped his face to silence him, her warm brown eyes smiling at him. ‘It’s alright dear, you could never hurt me.’ He had placed his hand over hers and leaned into the touch, running his finger over the ring. When she moved her hand away she seemed to remember something, and she weakly pulled the band off, holding it out to Holly with tears in her eyes. Ash’s sister was speechless as she pushed it into her hand, urging her to take it. ‘Keep this safe please, both of you.’_

He stared down at his hands and let out a shuddering sigh, biting his lip so he wouldn’t start crying in the middle of the store.

“See something you like?” A somewhat familiar voice called from behind Ash, causing him to jump and turn around with a startled gasp. He settled down quickly when he realized who it was.

“Oh, Crissy, it’s just you.” Ash chuckled nervously while looking up at the store manager. “I uh, I was just looking.”

She seemed to recognize him and she smiled, admiring his dress. “Oh, Ash, it’s so nice to see you! That dress looks amazing by the way.” Ash grinned sheepishly at the compliment and crossed his arms behind his back.

“It’s good to see you too, and thanks.”

“Did you come with your friends?” She glanced around, easily spotting the three girls all crowded around one of their newest clothing racks. “They’re regulars you know.”

“You mean Lillie, Mallow, and Lana?” He looked a bit confused until she told him about how the three of them started visiting the shop all of the time once they got jobs. “Oh wow, I had no idea. Of course, the jewelry here is pretty amazing.”

Crissy giggled, pleased with his praise of her work. “Why, thank you! I’m glad you like it.” It seemed as though she was about to say something more, but one of the cashiers called her over for help. “Well, duty calls, happy shopping Ash!”

Ash sighed once she had disappeared and scratched at the bandages on his arms, growling quietly at how itchy it was.

“What’s with the hat?”

“Huh?” Ash was startled once again out of his own head by a warm voice, his gaze shooting up to see Gladion standing a few feet away. Suddenly the room felt too hot and Ash was cursing Mother Nature and her timing. “Gladion! Arceus, you have the worst timing... What are you doing here?!” Ash felt like he was going to fall over in embarrassment as he swiftly adjusted his dress and hat.

“Lillie invited me, or well, forced me, but I probably would have said yes anyway.” He gave Ash’s arms a skeptical once-over but didn’t comment on the bandages. “So, what’s the occasion?” He asked, gesturing to the boy’s outfit.

Ash lost his composure and choked on air, doubling over with a hoarse cough. Gladion watched him with a worried look, while Umbreon shuffled out from behind his legs and greeted Pikachu by rubbing noses with the electric mouse. “I-I’m sorry, just give me one sec-second.” Ash held up a finger before clearing his throat a few times, finally straightening his posture to look up at the blonde. “Um, well you see-”

“It’s okay, you don’t actually have to answer that.” Gladion dismissed the subject entirely and peered over Ash’s shoulder to see what he was looking at earlier. “Rings, huh?” He picked one up carefully to look at it and Ash turned to see it as well.

“Gladion, you made it.” Lillie tapped her brother on the shoulder and both boys turned to see her, Mallow, and Lana all with shopping bags containing their new purchases. Gladion inwardly groaned as the trio bombarded him and Ash with pleads to go to the mall. Ash seemed to be at a loss for words, so Gladion decided to save him by asking Lillie if he and Ash could go train. Lillie agreed after a bit of persuasion and reassurance that they would be back later. Then, as fast as they had appeared, the three women were gone.

Ash sighed in relief as they both went out onto the beach, “Thanks, Gladion… I don’t know if I’m really up for training but-”

“That’s okay. I’ll see you later Ash.” He turned away and Umbreon reluctantly said goodbye to Pikachu.

Ash was stunned at how quickly he was leaving, but in a moment of temporary bravery, he called out to him. “Wait!” Running up to him, he held onto the hat on his head and smiled as Gladion turned to face him. “Do you want to go to Treasure Island with me?”

Gladion was surprised at Ash’s offer, but seeing the smile on his face, he couldn’t resist grinning in return and accepting the invite with a nod. “Treasure Island?” Without a word, Ash pointed to a large island in the distance, explaining that it was filled with wild Pokemon. “Okay, and how are we supposed to get there?” Gladion gave him a challenging smirk, relishing in the way Ash faltered at the sound of his voice.

“Um, Crissy will probably let us use her kayak. I’ll go ask her.” He ran back into Alola Sunrise, returning to the beach after a few long minutes with a large paddle and some snacks, which he put into his bag. “Ready?”

Gladion nodded once again and followed Ash, helping him drag Crissy’s larger, open kayak to the edge of the water. Ash helped Pikachu and Umbreon into the front seat first, watching them sit together and look out at the shining water in wonder. Ash placed his bag in the storage space at the front before climbing into the seat behind them, adjusting his dress as he prepared to sit down, but he stopped when he realized that Gladion was staring, unmoving, at the kayak. “Have you never been in one before?”

“Nope, first time.” The blonde scratched at his scalp while trying to figure out a way to step onto it. Ash extended a pale hand to him with a kind smile that single-handedly melted away Gladion’s worries. He helped him into the seat and then sat almost in his lap.

Ash instantly regretted all of his decisions as he felt Gladion’s body against his back, but he relaxed slightly when he got the kayak moving and the ocean surrounded them. Gladion tentatively wrapped his arms around Ash’s middle to ground himself. “Is this okay?” He mumbled barely above a whisper, to not break the peaceful atmosphere.

“Yeah,” Ash’s voice was breathy with admiration, but he tried to block out his thoughts and focus on where they were going.

\-----

Ash and Gladion pushed the kayak onto the beach fairly easily, both of them looking into the island’s lush forest for a long moment, savoring the calming environment. Ash retrieved his bag and Pikachu and Umbreon hopped out of the front, chirping excitedly. Gladion was so happy to see Umbreon enjoying herself, recognizing some of her childlike wonder that remained from when she was an Eevee.

“Come on out Lycanroc!” Ash threw Lycanroc’s Pokeball into the air, calling out his partner and smiling warmly when the rock-type was by his side in an instant, leaning against his legs. Gladion decided to let his Lycanroc out as well, knowing the two canines usually got along well. Ash moved to stand next to Gladion. “I think you’ll really like it here. Come on!”

As the two young men walked through the trees, Gladion couldn’t help but ask where they were going, but every time he asked, Ash just told him that it was a surprise. He was told to close his eyes before being led into a large clearing. Opening his eyes, he was shocked to see a field full of flowers and Pokemon. “Whoa, it’s beautiful.”

Ash nodded in agreement, giggling happily as he continued to pull Gladion along. They stopped in a grassy patch that didn’t have any flowers so they could sit down, and they looked on as Pikachu and Umbreon played around in the field, socializing with the other Pokemon. Both Lycanroc, however, were more content with lounging around their trainers in the sun. Gladion ran his fingers through both Pokemon’s fur, while Ash seemed to be talking to some of the Pokemon and collecting a pile of flowers. Gladion couldn’t help but glance at him from time to time, simply admiring how sweet he was to all of the wild Pokemon and how amazing he looked in the dress.

After a few minutes, Gladion felt something being placed on his head. He turned to see Ash clapping his hands, obviously looking pleased with himself. “What did you do to me?”

“Oh, nothing…” He stuck his tongue out playfully and held up what looked to be a flower crown, placing the intricate piece on his own head.

“Of course.” Gladion chuckled and took his crown off to look at it, inwardly praising Ash’s work. There was a variety of colorful flowers all woven onto a thick green band made from much smaller flowers with longer stems. He put it back on his head when he was done looking at it. “It’s pretty, thanks.”

Ash felt his face flush, humming in response to the compliment and continuing with the unfinished crown in his hands. After a few moments, he shuffled towards both Lycanroc and moved Gladion’s hands so he could put the two simpler bands he had made onto their heads. “All done!”

“Lycan, roc-roc!” Ash’s Lycanroc perked up and licked his hand as a way of thanking him. Gladion’s Lycanroc did the same, much to both of the trainer’s surprise. 

“Wow, Lycanroc likes it.”

“Really, you do?!” Ash looked at Gladion’s Lycanroc with a hopeful grin, hugging the rock-type excitedly when he agreed.

“Ash wait!-” Gladion was stunned into silence when he saw Lycanroc rubbing against Ash’s face happily, especially with how Lycanroc usually reacted to affection. “Huh, you’re something else.” He whispered to himself. 

A chorus of chanting caught the attention of the two men, especially Ash, who stood up as soon as he recognized the sound, almost falling over with how light-headed it made him. Gladion was there to steady him with a hand on his back, scolding him about slowing down. Ash was seemingly too giddy to hear him as he grabbed Gladion’s hand and led him towards the sound, both of their Lycanroc’s following. Ash called out to Pikachu and Umbreon, and soon the two smaller Pokemon caught up with them as well. “You just _have_ to see them, Gladion, they’re amazing!”

“Who do I have to see?”

“Exeggutor!” Ash glanced over his shoulder at him with a blinding smile and Gladion swore he could feel his inner walls crumbling to the ground, his heart bursting with joy as it accepted the dazzling ray of sunshine currently holding his hand.

\-----

“Isn’t it so cool?” Ash felt as though he was seeing the magnificent pool of water for the first time again. The atmosphere was so soothing, the sounds of the forest as well as those of the waterfall all melding together in a peaceful song. He took a long breath, enjoying the various scents that quieted his thoughts.

Gladion was in awe of the area, but he couldn’t pry his eyes away from Ash, especially seeing how serene he looked in the shade of the trees. Ash was too lost in his thoughts to notice his staring, so Gladion allowed himself to admire the boy and savor the feeling of their joined hands until Ash pulled away.

Ash struggled with his sandals, almost falling over into the sand while he tried to pry them off his feet, but once he managed to get them off he dug his toes into the sand with a delighted squeal. Gladion copied his movements and was pleased with how warm the sand felt beneath him.

“Hi, Exeggutor! Remember me?” Ash was already running up to the group of Exeggutor by the time Gladion had relaxed into the sand, earning a humored shake of the blonde’s head. One of the Exeggutor had lowered their head and was currently studying Ash, grinning widely when they recognized his voice and appearance. After another moment Ash came racing back to Gladion. “Do you want to swim? The water is nice.”

‘ _How am I supposed to say no to that face_?’ Gladion sighed playfully before agreeing, unable to keep a smile off of his lips. “You ask me as if I have a choice.”

Ash giggled at the remark, “You’re right, you don’t.” He sat Lillie’s hat safely on a log and placed his shoes by it as well, moving to pull his dress off but struggling when he couldn’t get it over his head.

Gladion thought he was going to pass out, his face burning with a hot blush that traveled all the way to his chest. “Um, need some help?” He raised an eyebrow at Ash as he folded his arms down to reveal his face, glaring down at the dress before realizing he had been asked a question.

“Yeah, thanks.” He held his arms above his head while Gladion pulled the bundle of soft fabric up, successfully getting it off in mere moments. Both boys froze when their eyes met, seemingly floating off into their own world found only in the other’s gaze.

Pikachu and Umbreon’s happy chittering snapped them both out of their dazed states, causing them to look over and see the two Pokemon playing in the water together. Gladion chuckled and pulled his hoodie off. “It’s been a while since she’s had this much fun.”

“Huh?”

“Umbreon. Usually, she’s very proper and closed off, I’m glad to see her enjoying herself again. It’s like when she was an Eevee.”

Ash grinned and watched the dark-type twirl around in the water, gracefully dodging the water that was flung at her by Pikachu. Dusk Lycanroc suddenly appeared by Ash’s side, nosing at his bandages with a whimper. Ash felt himself stiffen as Gladion peered curiously at them. To both of the trainer’s surprise, Midnight Lycanroc also approached Ash, running one of his paws over the bandages while staring into the younger man’s eyes. “Lycan, Lycanroc. Roc-Roc.”

“I don’t know, Lycanroc-”

“It’s okay Ash.” Gladion had somehow appeared in front of him, reaching out to carefully take Ash’s wrists in his hands. “Please, you can trust me… What happened to you?”

He already felt the tell-tale burning of oncoming tears in his eyes and throat as he stared up into Gladion’s emerald orbs. He grabbed onto Gladion’s arms to ground himself, inhaling sharply as he dragged him over to the log and sat down. Gladion crouched in front of him in the sand and reached up one of his hands to move Ash’s hair off his cheek, cradling his jaw gently. “I-I…” _Deep breaths Ash_ . _This is Gladion_ , _you can trust him_ , _please just trust him_. “My mom… My mom is gone.” He let his tears fall, but instead of feeling worse when he said it out loud, his chest felt lighter and his heart hurt just a little less. “I- Didn’t know how to deal with it, s-so I-” Ash stopped himself when his voice gave away and a sob tore through his throat. Midnight Lycanroc took the end of the bandage on one of his arms and untucked it, pulling on the beige fabric tentatively to unravel it. He did one loop at a time, slowly revealing the skin underneath.

Gladion faintly gasped at the sight, feeling himself tearing up. “Oh, Ash…” Without a second thought, he maneuvered his arm to be closer to his face and he planted a soft kiss on the largest partly-healed cut. Ash wiped his face with his other arm and watched in amazement at the blonde’s actions.

“Gladion…” He took a shuddering breath. “Do that again, please.”

“What was that?”

“Do that again.”

Gladion was surprised, but he continued placing small kisses all over his blemished skin, noticing as he did so that there were more than just cuts, but also burns and a giant old scar. When he was done, he took his time in unwrapping Ash’s other arm as well, studying it before returning to his ministrations.

He lifted his head to look at Ash once more and have the boy a sad smile. “I’m here for you Ash, anytime.” Ash couldn’t find the words to express how relieved he felt, so he nodded in understanding and placed his hands on Gladion’s cheeks, pulling him forward and leaning his forehead against the blonde’s. Gladion ran his fingers through Ash’s raven hair, the soft feeling implanting itself in his memory. Both of the Lycanroc nuzzled up to Ash and purred lowly when he and Gladion laughed, petting the both of them.

“So, swimming?” Ash finally spoke up and Gladion nodded, pulling Ash to his feet and into the water. He lifted him by his waist and spun him around, basking in the glow of his smile and the bright sound of his laughter. The two of them played around in the sparkling water with Pikachu and Umbreon, both of their Lycanroc watching them from where they were curled up together on the beach.

Finally, all of the blushing, and the shy smiles, and the soft touches, it started to make sense. There was no going back now. When their eyes connected once again, they knew they were falling, and neither of them wanted to reach the ground.


	6. Dancing Around the Obvious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sometimes reunions aren't what you expect.

Ash was humming as he ran the brush through Lycanroc’s fur, making sure to remove all of the tangles in the Pokemon’s white mane with a content smile. He was daydreaming about his adventure on Treasure Island with Gladion that happened just over a week ago, a little upset that he hadn’t been able to see the boy since then. Lycanroc’s tail was wagging happily against Ash’s side as the rock-type lay outstretched on his trainer’s lap, purring happily at the attention. “Roc, lycan.” He rubbed his muzzle against Ash’s hand, almost causing him to drop the brush.

“Enjoying yourself, Lycanroc?”

“Roc-roc!” He barked in response and laid his head back onto his trainer’s thigh, closing his eyes as he let out a relaxed breath. Ash was pleased to see the hound Pokemon looking so calm. Pikachu joined them on Ash’s new bed with a squeak, nestling himself in the space between Ash’s neck and shoulder.

“Hi, Pikachu.” He kissed his partner Pokemon on the cheek and nuzzled his face affectionately, giggling at Pikachu’s delighted squeals.

“Pika?” The electric mouse opened his eyes and glanced at the loft’s ladder just as Kukui peeked up over the wood.

“Oh hello, Professor.” Ash waved the brush at Kukui and the Professor grinned as Lycanroc barked lightly in greeting.

“You guys seem peppy today. The gang was wondering if you wanted to go for a walk later, they say they have a Mega Punch surprise for you.”

Ash thought about it for a moment before shrugging his shoulders, “Sure, why not. Do you know what time?”

“Kiawe and Sophocles said they’ll come to pick you up in a few hours, so you’ll have the house to yourself until this afternoon.” He gave one last smile before telling them that he was heading out for the day to take Daisy to school. Ash thanked him and reached over to his desk to put the brush down, carefully moving Lycanroc off of his lap so he could make breakfast for everyone. “Pikachu, could you wake up Rowlet for me?”

\-----

Ash rubbed at his eyes, grumbling as he sat up slowly on his bed. “Shit, what time is it…” He felt around for his phone with a half-lidded stare, giving Lycanroc a thankful pat when the wolf Pokemon nudged the device with his paw. “Oh thank Arceus, I thought I slept all day.” He sighed and forced himself to stand, stretching his arms above his head with a high-pitched groan. It took him a moment to recover from the light-headed dizziness that the stretch brought him, but once he was stable on his feet he picked out one of his newer outfits and slid down the ladder.

After a drowsy trip to the bathroom to change, Ash emerged with another long stretch of his muscles. He glanced around the kitchen blindly for a minute before remembering which cabinet the first aid kit was in. He placed it on the table before calling out Incineroar. “Mind helping me, Incineroar?”

“Neroar.” Incineroar took one of the fresh bandages that Ash handed him, inspecting Ash’s arm as he held it up, noticing how the trainer avoided eye contact. “Incineroar-roar.” He gently started wrapping the arm, stopping whenever Ash flinched at the way the bandages rubbed at his skin.

After what felt like forever, Incineroar let him know that he was finished and Ash looked up at him with a sad smile. “Thanks, Incineroar.” He followed the Pokemon up into the loft where Pikachu and Lycanroc were playing while Rowlet took a nap on the window sill. “So, what do we think?” He held open his arms, showing off his outfit. Ash wasn’t an expert in fashion by any means, but he thought the black shorts paired well with his pale blue hoodie and black sneakers, as well as the white sun hat Lillie bought him. All of his Pokemon chirped in approval and Pikachu climbed up to his shoulder, flattening himself out just enough to fit beneath the hat. “Sorry it takes up so much room buddy. Lillie said it would help me not get sunburnt.” He gave his partner an apologetic smile before staring down at his hands. “Man, I  _ am  _ pale now. I look like Gladion!” He groaned, earning amused laughter from his team.

\-----

Ash perked up from his spot on his bed at the sound of a knock at the door, quickly closing the sketchbook in his hands and slipping the pencil into the large spiral on the top. He stuffed it into his bag along with all of his Pokeballs, returning everyone but Pikachu and Lycanroc.

The ravenette made sure he had everything he needed and he checked the time on his phone, remembering to text the Professor that he was about to leave. He hurried down from the loft and over to the front door, grinning as he saw Kiawe and Sophocles standing on the porch. “Ready to go, Ash?”

“Yep!” He adjusted the hat on his head, ignoring the funny looks from the two boys as he scratched subconsciously at Pikachu’s chin. They all set off together into town, and Ash felt his discomfort rise with every sideways glance at his hoodie. Suddenly he stopped walking and pulled Pikachu off of his shoulder and hugged him to his middle with a frown. “Just get it over with, I know he told you all.”

“We’re sorry Ash, it’s just…” Sophocles trailed off, seemingly unable to find the right words.

“We just want to know how we can help, and why you didn’t tell us earlier.” Kiawe sighed and finished Sophocles’ thought.

Ash’s brain took a minute to form a coherent response as he glared down at the ground. “I just… It’s so hard to trust people. And I want to trust you all with everything, I really do, but after so many years of hiding everything… It just feels like too much.” Lycanroc and Pikachu comforted him as he felt tears building, but he regained his composure after some deep breaths. “Sometime, I’ll tell you guys but… Right now I just want to meet up with everybody else.” A small smile curled his lips as the other two boys nodded in understanding and they continued their trek. Ash gladly fell into familiar banter with the two as they walked, and he allowed himself to relax with some licks on his face from Pikachu. “Thanks, buddy.” He whispered to the electric mouse with a small kiss to the nose.

After a while, they finally met up with the rest of the group in the market, greeting all of the trainers and their partners. “Hey boys, took you long enough.” Mallow waved at the three approaching trainers with a wide grin, Lillie’s hand grasped firmly by her side. Lana was seemingly talking to her phone, making silly faces at the device with in-between giggles. When Ash looked at her with his face twisted up in confusion, Sophocles explained that she was probably on facetime with her girlfriend.

To all of the young men’s surprise, Gladion was also with the group. When he noticed Ash approaching, a tiny smile appeared on his face. Ash blushed at the thought that the smile was just for him and happily returned it.

Lana glanced up from her phone and greeted the three eagerly, bouncing on her toes as she thrust her phone into Ash’s face for him to see. “Hiya, Ash!” Misty’s voice called out through the phone, and Ash stared at her in shock for a moment before looking up at Lana.

“You and Misty?-”

“Yep!” Lana stuck her tongue out with a cheeky smile and Ash gave his congratulations, finally saying hello back to Misty so she could get back to talking with the blue-haired girl. Lillie was whispering something to her brother as Ash looked over to them and he could feel his face heat up as Gladion’s eyes were already on him.

Unable to bear the eye contact, he cleared his throat and looked to Mallow, Kiawe, and Sophocles. “So, what are we doing exactly?” 

“We’re going for a walk, then we’re going to go eat somewhere,” Kiawe explained, wrapping his arm around Sophocles’ shoulder to pull the protesting boy closer.

“And we have a surprise!” Lillie finally chimed in, an excited glint in her soft green eyes.

Ash rolled his eyes playfully. “Yeah, Kukui said that too. What is with you guys and surprises?” He mindlessly scratched at the bandages on his arm when he felt a sort of prickle in his mind, a flash of feeling that he didn’t understand. Pikachu’s ears twitched as he seemed to sense something as well, but the two of them dismissed the strangeness as the group set off. Mallow and Lillie led the group while Sophocles, Lana, and Kiawe all started talking after Misty had hung up, and Gladion and Ash trailed at the back.

“It’s good to see you,” Gladion mumbled, glancing at Ash out of the corner of his eye. “Stop scratching your arm, you’ll irritate it.” He gently placed a hand over Ash’s fingers and Ash looked startled, forcing his hand to stop.

“Sorry, I didn’t know I was doing it…” He let Gladion’s hand rest on his arm for a few more moments before they both peeled away. Ash drifted closer until their shoulders were brushing, letting the small amount of contact comfort him.

“It’s okay, not your fault.” Dusk Lycanroc left Ash’s side to walk next to Midnight Lycanroc, the two of them chatting and enjoying the fresh air. Gladion watched both of them for a moment before nudging Ash gently with his elbow, gesturing to the canines. “I think they like each other.” He chuckled under his breath and Ash looked at them questioningly.

“Like each other?” His face screwed up as he didn’t understand what Gladion meant, but when it finally clicked, his face went red in embarrassment. “Oh, I see… Aw, how cute.”

He giggled which caught the attention of the two oblivious Lycanrocs, the pair looking up at him with tilted heads. “Roc?”

“It’s nothing!”

\-----

“Oh, and remember when we had a picnic with Grandpa Forest? It was so fun, you missed it, Ash.”

At the mention of his name, Ash snapped out of his dissociating state and looked up from where he was staring at his shoes. “Hm? Oh, yeah.” Everyone turned to give him a strange look, at which he adjusted his hat nervously. “What?”

“Did you even hear me?” Mallow crossed her arms and raised her brow.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled, shuffling his feet while scratching at his arm again. Gladion tentatively reached out and stilled his hand, trying not to draw too much attention to his actions by staring in another direction.

Lillie stepped towards him and grabbed his shoulders, staring into his eyes with a sympathetic look. “Ash, you know you can talk to us any time-”

“ _ Ash _ ?”

Ash stiffened at the sound of something behind him, his heart instantly racing as the familiar voice repeated in his mind. Pikachu turned around curiously, squealing excitedly as he leaped from Ash’s shoulder towards the voice. The ravenette turned his body slowly, unable to comprehend who he saw standing before him. “Greninja, is that really you?” He already felt tears rolling down his face as he reached out to touch the Pokemon, needing reassurance that he was real and not just a figment of his imagination. “I missed you so much…” His face contorted with a sad smile before he couldn’t hold it all in anymore. He pulled the Pokemon into a tight hug, relishing in the familiar warmth and comfort that Greninja brought him.

“ _ I missed you too _ , _ Ash _ .” Greninja held him just as tightly in return, his heart aching with joy as he finally reunited with his trainer. Despite the two of them being apart for so long, they could both sense that their bond was still as strong as ever.

Ash sobbed into the Pokemon’s shoulder, his body shuddering in the frog’s arms as his thoughts flooded with memories. Suddenly, there were three more pairs of arms wrapped around the young man as he cried. He let himself cry until he couldn’t anymore, pulling away slightly to see who else had joined the hug. “Clemont, Bonnie, Serena?” He was breathless as he looked into the watery eyes of his friends, wiping at his tears so he could see them better. “I can’t be-believe it… You guys are really here, you’re here…” He choked on another sob but he held it back as they all smiled at him.

“Hi, Ash. It’s so good to see you.” Clemont wiped at his face as well, unable to contain just how happy he was to see Ash again. Bonnie and Serena seemed to be doing the same thing.

“We have a lot to catch up on.” Serena gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze.

“Yes, so much!” Bonnie chimed in, earning giggles from everyone.

Ash gasped as he realized something, perking up and turning to look back at his Alolan friends. “Was this my surprise?”

“Yep, sure was! It was Gladion’s idea.” Lillie chuckled as they all nodded excitedly. “Do you like it?” Ash couldn’t find the words to describe how happy he was, so he gave them a quick nod and pulled them all in for a group hug, his arms mainly latching onto Gladion first. He nuzzled his face into Gladion’s chest while the blonde laid his cheek on his head.

“Thanks, guys, thanks Gladion.” The last part of his sentence was whispered in Gladion’s ear, earning a soft ‘You’re welcome’ from the man in return.

Ash turned back to Clemont, Bonnie, Serena, and Greninja to study them, noticing how much more mature they looked. “Dammit, Bonnie, how are you as tall as me?!”

The blonde girl laughed at his realization, “Not my fault you’re a shortie!”

“Not fair.” He pouted with crossed arms, earning sarcastic ‘aw’s from all of his friends. “Hey wait, you’re a trainer now aren’t you?”

“She sure is.” Clemont grinned proudly, ruffling Bonnie’s hair, much to the girl’s disdain. She opened her bag and retrieved Dedenne’s Pokeball, catching him in her hands when she released him and holding him out to Ash.

“Hi, Dedenne!” Ash held his arm out and let the smaller mouse run up to his shoulder eagerly.

“Pika pika!” Pikachu followed after jumping from Greninja’s shoulder.

“Denenene!”

The girls and Sophocles seemed to be admiring Dedenne, cooing at him and telling him how cute he was. Their praise was interrupted, however, by a sudden low growl from Lycanroc. In an instant, Greninja was standing beside Ash defensively, his gaze fixated on people that were approaching from behind the three Kalos friends. “What’s up with you guys?” Ash looked startled at his Pokémon’s behavior, especially so when he noticed even Pikachu had his fur ruffled and electricity was sizzling on his cheeks.

“Hi, everyone- Ah!” Shauna jumped to hide behind Serena when Lycanroc barked loudly in their direction.

Nini also appeared, looking at the hound fearfully. “Oh, dear!”

“I’m so sorry, I don’t know why he’s acting like this.” Ash crouched down to Lycanroc’s level, carefully carding his fingers through the rock type’s mane. “Calm down guys, please.” Everyone looked at Ash and his Pokemon worriedly, wondering what the cause of their sudden aggression was.

The last person finally arrived and she shouldered her way through the group of Kalos friends to approach Ash, only to be stopped by a snarling Lycanroc as Ash failed to hold him back. “Lycanroc, what in the world has gotten into you?!”

“Hello Ash, good to see you.” The girl piped up, her voice prompting Ash to glance up from his place on the ground. She seemed to completely ignore the upset hound Pokemon currently warning her to back off.

“M-Miette?” Ash felt like he was going to puke, his head pounding as it felt too light on his shoulders. His ears were ringing and he could feel himself breathing faster by the millisecond. He seemed to be frozen in time, his arms half-outstretched from his failed attempt to hold Lycanroc back while he blinked up at the girl above him. Greninja joined Lycanroc in growling at the blue-haired woman, both him and Lycanroc staring into her eyes angrily.

Gladion could instantly tell something was wrong, Lycanroc had never reacted to anyone that way before and certainly not Pikachu. Also, from what Ash had told him about Greninja, the frog wasn’t very likely to be that aggressive either. Not to mention, something about the way all of Ash’s Kalos friends fell silent as the Miette girl completely ignored Ash’s defensive Pokemon in favor of talking to him, didn’t sit right with him. He noticed Ash began to lightly shake so he gestured to Lillie for her to step forward, and the two of them helped Ash to his feet slowly, each of them grabbing onto one of his biceps to keep him grounded.

Serena pulled Miette back by her arm and sighed. “Everyone, this is Shauna, Nini, and Miette. They competed with me in my first Pokemon Showcase belt. I’m sorry, would you all excuse us for a moment?” She laughed nervously and forced Miette away from the group to talk with her heatedly. Shauna and Nini tentatively approached when they noticed Lycanroc had backed up and woven himself between Ash and Gladion’s legs.

“I’m Shauna, Serena’s girlfriend.” She waved at the Alolan natives and they all greeted her kindly.

“And I’m Nini, it’s so great to meet you all!” The green-haired girl introduced herself and got the same welcoming response from the group.

After Clemont and Bonnie had properly introduced themselves, Gladion and Lillie guided a still-shaking Ash over to a nearby bench and Lillie sat with him while Gladion crouched in front of him. “Ash, can you hear us?” Lillie was rubbing his back worriedly, looking at her brother helplessly at Ash’s lack of response.

“Hey Ash, I need you to breathe, okay? Listen, breathe with me.” Ash didn’t seem to be listening as he stared at the ground, his breathing getting increasingly erratic. “Ash!” Gladion was starting to panic, and Lillie knew they had to call the Professor immediately.

She walked a few feet away and held her phone to her ear, pacing around and mumbling under her breath as she waited for Kukui to answer. Mallow, Lana, Kiawe, and Sophocles all talked with Clemont, Bonnie, Shauna, and Nini quietly, all of them glancing in Ash’s direction with increasing concern. Pikachu was sitting on Ash’s shoulder, trying everything he could think of to calm his trainer to no avail. All of the Pokemon were currently trying to keep Dusk Lycanroc and Greninja by the group to prevent them from running off after Serena and Miette.

“So Shauna and Nini, I don’t mean to be rude, but why did you both and Miette come?” Mallow seemed to ask the question that all of the Alolan friends were thinking, as they all looked at the performers awaiting a response.

“Well, we were already planning on traveling here with Serena for a meeting with a big marketing company that has been planning to bring Pokemon Showcases to Alola. So, when Serena was invited to come out early to see Ash again, she decided to bring us along. Professor Kukui said it was alright since we’re all friends of Ash, so now here we are.” Shauna explained, twisting one of her pigtails anxiously.

“We’re sorry about Miette by the way, she can be a bit much…” Nini sighed.

The Alolan group all nodded in understanding, but Kiawe sensed that there was something they still weren’t sharing with them. He stepped forward with his arms crossed, feeling only slightly guilty about his idea to intimidate them into talking. “Why did Ash react like that to Miette? I know there is something you all aren’t telling us, so spill.”

They all glanced at each other with wary hesitance before Clemont cleared his throat to speak. “Ash and Miette have a bit of a… History.” He went on to explain how both Serena and Miette had obvious feelings for the ravenette, at least until Ash had admitted that he didn’t feel the same to Serena and she respectfully backed off. Miette, however, was always pushy and very adamant with her flirting, even going so far as to try and kiss him without permission. Greninja would always save Ash at the last moment with a distraction, which Ash was clearly grateful for. When Serena was invited to the ball for the Pokemon Showcase performers, they all decided to attend, and Miette had shown up as well. She practically forced Ash to be her date, and he was miserable almost all night.

“Something must have happened that we don’t know about. After that night, anytime Miette was even mentioned, Ash would freeze up and excuse himself from the conversation.” Bonnie’s expression was pained as Dedenne nuzzled into her cheek.

The group was speechless as they looked between themselves, all seemingly thinking of anything horrible that could have happened. Serena finally returned with a grumpy Miette, profusely apologizing about their long absence. Lycanroc and Greninja were still clearly on their guard, but the growling had thankfully stopped.

Gladion had overheard everything the group had said and was now holding Ash’s hands to his face, still trying to speak to the younger man as Lillie paced while waiting for Kukui. Ash was shaking with tears and was still struggling to breathe, and Gladion felt so useless. “Please Ash, it’s okay, I’m right here. It’s me, Gladion, listen to me, Ash.”

Gladion refused to let go of Ash’s hand during the trek to the restaurant, as well as when they got there. All of them were wary of sitting together after the earlier events, but Kukui reassured them all that he would talk with Ash about it later. The group, or more specifically Serena, Shauna, and Nini, made sure Miette was the farthest away from Ash at the long table. Ash refused to make eye contact with anyone as he sat down, laying his head on Gladion’s shoulder and snuggling up to his side. They all sat in awkward silence for a moment until a waiter appeared and took everyone’s drink order.

Kukui ordered water for Ash while everyone, in an attempt to ease the tension in the air, made light conversation. Gladion rubbed his thumb over the back of Ash’s hand repeatedly, mostly to comfort Ash but also as a way to calm himself. He had a strong, selfish urge to take Ash away and keep him to himself, where he knew the ravenette boy would be safe.


	7. Do You Love Him?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> love is best when uncomplicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING : DEPICTIONS OF SELF-HARM AND ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION

“Professor Kukui?”

“Yeah, Gladion?”

Gladion glanced down at the boy that was currently plastered to his side, his eyes droopy with fatigue as they stopped walking. “Would you mind if Ash spent the night at the mansion tonight?”

Kukui smiled and let out a relieved sigh, “Of course, just make sure you both wake up on time for tomorrow.” He walked up to Ash and held the younger man’s face gently so he could talk to him. “I’ll see you tomorrow son, get some good rest tonight, okay?”

“G’night, dad…” The ravenette mumbled, looking up into Kukui’s eyes with an exhausted half-smile. Kukui was surprised by Ash calling him dad, but he recovered quickly and ruffled the trainer’s hair.

“Take good care of him, Gladion.” Kukui gave him a knowing look as he turned and continued to walk with the group.

Lillie slowed down her pace so she could walk beside her brother. “Hobbes and the driver are on their way.”

“Thanks, I think it’s time for bed.” He smiled at Ash who was oblivious to their conversation, the younger man preferring to close his eyes and cling to Gladion like a Komala in an attempt to sleep standing up. Gladion couldn’t look away from his peaceful face, very happy to see him so relaxed after the incident earlier that day.

Lillie giggled at the obviously smitten face of her brother, “You guys are too cute, you know?”

“Huh?” He looked up at her and blushed, shaking his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He grumbled, earning a laugh from Lillie at his childishness.

Everyone gave their sleepy goodbyes and dispersed once the sleek black limousine pulled up, all of them wishing Ash a goodnight and watching him with concern. Lillie reassured them all that he would be fine while Gladion helped him into the back seat, sitting with an arm wrapped around the boy’s shoulders as he laid his head on his chest.

“Pikachu, use Iron… Tail…” Ash was mumbling battle commands in his half-asleep state, at which both Gladion and Pikachu giggled. Lillie climbed in after them and she and Snowy watched the two boys with wide smiles.

When they finally reached the mansion, Gladion practically carried Ash to his room, where he laid Ash on his bed with an already sleeping Pikachu. “Huh? Where… Am I?” Ash’s eyes were only slightly open but he somehow noticed that Gladion was tucking him into a bed.

“Get some rest, Ash.”

“G’night Glads…” He yawned, turning towards the trainer and wrapping an arm around Pikachu. Gladion smiled at the nickname and how serene Ash looked as he drifted off to sleep. He sighed and laid on the palette that Hobbes had set out for him beforehand, both of the Lycanroc snuggling up against his back together.

\-----

Gladion woke up in a dazed state, his mind taking a few moments to register the fact that it was still pitch black in his room. He was confused as to what could have woken him, so he sat up and glanced around his room, rubbing at his eyes to help them adjust faster. He looked over to the bed to see the covers thrown off to the side and Pikachu curled up by himself, with Ash nowhere to be found. He sighed and stood up slowly, stumbling around a bit as sleep still weighed heavily on his body.

The blonde knocked on the bathroom door that was connecting to his bedroom and received no answer. He opened the door and Ash wasn’t there, so he scratched at his head, puzzled as to where he could have disappeared to. Gladion walked out into the dark hallways and headed towards the kitchen, thinking that maybe Ash had gone to get a drink or something. “Ash? Are you in here?” He peeked around the corner to see that some of the lights were on, dimly illuminating the countertop. “Where the hell did you go?” He grumbled, running his hands over his face as he walked around the island to go to the dining room.

A glint of something in the corner of his vision caught his eye, and he turned slightly to see what it was. “Oh, my fuck…” He was stunned, his body feeling like it was unable to move for too many moments as he stared, horrified, at the sight before him.

Ash was laying on the floor, his head bent at an awkward angle as he was slumped against the island, his arms hanging limply by his sides as blood dripped from them onto the floor. One of the knives from the knife set was abandoned by his leg, in a position that seemed to result from it sliding out of his loose hand. When Gladion’s brain recovered from the shock, the panic set in and he dropped to his knees with a broken cry, quickly pulling Ash into his arms and screaming out into the echoey home. “Dad, help! Please, anyone! MOMMY!”

Lusamine rushed into the kitchen with a wild look on her face, looking around frantically for her son, Mohn following close behind her. “Gladion? Baby, what- Oh my Arceus, Ash!” She joined Gladion on the floor, holding Ash’s head up as she instructed Gladion to apply pressure to his wrists. “Mohn, call the hospital!” She shouted at her worried husband, who immediately fumbled for his phone and dialed the number as soon as he could. Lillie and Hobbes also appeared, the both of them watching the scene unfold in terror. Lillie buried her face in Hobbes’ jacket as she sobbed, and the older man comforted her by turning her away from what was happening and wrapping her in his arms. He covered her head with one arm, doing his best to block out the noise as she tried to keep from having a panic attack.

“Ash, stay with us!” Lusamine did her best to get the boy to respond while Gladion was shaking with tears, silently praying to Arceus and all of Alola’s Guardians that he had found the younger man in time.

\-----

They all watched the blonde man pace the lobby impatiently, his hands shaking with worry and still covered in blood. Lillie leaned into Lusmine’s side as she watched her brother with a creased brow, wishing that he would go wash off his hands and sit down before he passed out from stress.

Pikachu was napping restlessly in Kukui’s arms, the electric mouse clearly worried about his trainer even in his sleep. Dusk Lycanroc approached Gladion and grabbed at his pants carefully with his teeth, tugging on the fabric and trying to lead him to the seating area. He sighed and bent down to Lycanroc’s level, wanting to run his fingers through the rock-type’s fur like Ash usually did as he held back tears. “I’m sorry Lycanroc, I know you all are worried about him too…” He gave in when Midnight Lycanroc grabbed his arm and led him to one of the stiff couches, both of the hounds cuddling up to either side of the trainer as he finally sat down. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back, blocking out his surroundings as he tried to think of more positive memories. His thoughts instantly rerouted to his adventure with Ash to Treasure Island, the image of Ash’s glowing smile imprinted in his mind. The younger man’s presence had been so bright that day, the brightest it had been since he had returned to Alola.

The image of Ash lying still on the floor flashed in his mind and all he could see was his beautiful ray of sun fading away. He flinched and his eyes flew open as he tried to escape from the moment that had burned itself into the back of his eyelids.

Suddenly, everyone looked to where a door was opening and a nurse stepped out. Gladion was on his feet in seconds, watching the nurse expectantly as she turned to the exhausted group. Pikachu’s ears twitched as he woke up, his eyes blinking open slowly. When he realized there was a nurse, he perked up and was buzzing with tense curiosity. “Are you all here for Ash Ketchum?” Kukui stood as well and nodded, placing Pikachu on his shoulder once the Pokemon was fully awake.

“Yes, is he going to be okay?”

“Ash will be just fine. Thank Arceus you all got him here so quickly, any later and…” She trailed off as they all let out sighs of relief, an invisible weight lifting off of their shoulders. Gladion bit his lip to keep from crying at the good news, taking a deep breath as the nurse seemed to be speaking again. “He’s sleeping right now but are either of his parents here?”

Kukui stiffened slightly, “I’m afraid Ash’s parents aren’t… With us anymore. But Ash has been staying with me, would it be alright if I went to see him?”

The nurse looked apologetic at his admission, “Of course, follow me.”

Gladion watched as Kukui and Pikachu disappeared with the nurse behind a closed door, his heart aching to see Ash again. He slumped back down on the sofa and both Lycanroc laid their chins in his lap. “I know. Soon, we’ll get to see him.”

Kukui sat in the chair silently, his mouth in a thin line as he watched Ash’s chest rise and fall slowly. His arms were covered in bloody bandages and gauze, and there was an IV in his arm. There was a mess of other wires as well, and Kukui was careful not to tug on any of them as he reached out and cradled Ash’s hand in his own. “Everything’s gonna be okay, Ash. You’ll be okay.” Never in his life had Kukui missed Ash’s aura of happiness more than in that moment.

He decided to stay for a few more minutes before going to get Gladion, knowing that the boy surely wanted to see the ravenette.

\-----

Mallow, Sophocles, and Lana stumbled through the hospital’s front doors together, all of them searching the lobby for their friends. When Lillie noticed her girlfriend, she stood swiftly and ran to her arms, letting out a broken sob as she buried her face in Mallow’s shoulder. They held each other and Mallow stroked Lillie’s hair placatingly. Kiawe came in just a few moments later, hardly remembering to recall Charizard as he hurried over to them. “How is he?”

Lillie sniffled as she pulled back, wiping her face on her arm without a care for how gross it was. “He’s okay, just sleeping…” The tension in their bodies seemed to fade with that, but their expressions still held all of their worries.

They all sat down in the section of grouped chairs and small couches, huddling up together as they did during sleepovers as kids. They heard a parade of incoming footsteps and were startled by a familiar blue Pokemon.

Clemont, Bonnie, and Serena all practically ran into the hospital, chasing after a panicking Greninja. “Greninja, wait!” Clemont called, reaching out and grabbing onto the frog’s arm to pull him to a stop. “You have to calm down!” He held onto the Pokemon as he tried to struggle free, calling out towards the doors that led further into the hospital.

Lillie stood up and approached them, “Clemont, Bonnie, Serena! What happened to Greninja?”

They looked confused as to why Lillie was there until they glanced behind her to see all of Ash’s Alolan friends, with Ash nowhere in sight.

“Greninja woke us up, he came out of his Pokeball on his own and started freaking out. We didn’t know what was wrong, but we had to follow him when he got out of the hotel room. I don’t understand why he’s acting like this!” Clemont admitted helplessly, his eyes wide. “Is something wrong with Ash?”

Lusamine stared at them for a moment before she stood and explained, watching as their faces fell with each word.

“I hope he’s alright.” Bonnie’s lip quivered as she started crying as well, hiding her face in Serena’s side as she hugged her shoulders.

“He’s strong, you know that. He survived last time, remember?” She looked up at Serena and received a sad but reassuring smile.

“Last time?” Everyone seemed to be surprised that Gladion spoke after sitting in silence for so long. “What do you mean, has this happened before?”

Serena sighed tiredly and nodded her head, while Clemont cleared his throat. “Something similar, yes.” When the group all gave him imploring looks, he hesitated before going on to explain what happened in Kalos, more specifically what happened with Lysandre. “He didn’t know how to cope, so he closed himself off from us and his team, even Pikachu. Serena and Bonnie found him…” He trailed off when the aforementioned girls shivered at the memory, shutting his mouth so he didn’t upset them any further.

Gladion was slightly shaking, and he excused himself to the bathroom as he felt sweat beading on his forehead. He disappeared behind the bathroom door and he quickly shut it, his vision blurring as he gripped the porcelain sink tightly and leaned over it. He felt like he was going to pass out, images cycling in his vision that made him sick. Ash with blood dripping from his arms, Ash being held hostage by someone that wanted to use him, Ash splayed out on the floor, his breathing stilled and his eyes dull…

Gladion was unable to hear the unlocked door open as Kukui stepped inside, the Professor calling his name as he noticed him staring blankly at the sink, swaying on his feet. When the blonde glanced up through tear-filled eyes to see the Professor, his breathing picked up. “I-I told you I would take care of him. I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry…” He couldn’t stop apologizing as the older man held him in his arms, reassuring him that everything was fine and that he didn’t need to say sorry. Gladion pulled at his hair, his brain trying to find a way to calm him and release his pent-up emotions. Kukui had to wrestle his hands away from his head and hold them out, accepting the few weak punches of resistance that he received.

After a few minutes of Gladion crying so hard he almost started hyperventilating, Kukui grabbed the boy’s shoulders when he had run out of tears. “Gladion, look me in the eyes. Listen to me.”

The blonde boy rubbed at his eyes so he could see Kukui’s face and took a shuddering breath.

“It’s not your fault Gladion, don’t blame yourself. Ash is going to be okay, we’re all going to get through this together. Plus, if you hadn’t found him then he wouldn’t even be here right now.” When Gladion nodded in understanding, Kukui brought him back into a hug until he was ready to go back into the lobby.

After washing the blood from his hands, Gladion splashed cold water on his face to eliminate the last traces of his nausea, whispering his thanks to Kukui when he was handed paper towels to dry off. They walked out into the lobby together and Gladion went up to the couch he was previously sitting on, petting both of the Lycanroc when they stared up at him with worry. “I’m alright.”

“Brother?” Lillie made eye contact with her older sibling, communicating her question without even having to speak, to which he nodded as a way of saying he would be okay.

The Professor approached the couch as well and ran a hand over Dusk Lycanroc’s back. “Do you three want to go visit Ash?” He mumbled the question, pleased to see Gladion light up, even if just a bit, at the offer.

“Can we really?”

“Of course, Pikachu is already in there waiting for you.” He gestured towards the nurse and Gladion walked over tentatively, asking her to take him to Ash. He followed her into the halls and Kukui watched him go with a bittersweet smile. ‘ _He really cares about Ash_ , _I just hope he can tell him_.’

“Hi…” Gladion’s voice was hoarse so he cleared his throat as he approached the side of the hospital bed. “Erm, hi Ash.” He noticed that one of the chairs had already been dragged towards the bedside, so he sat in it gingerly. Dusk and Midnight Lycanroc climbed onto the end of the bed and curled up by Ash’s feet together. Gladion smiled softly and leaned forward as he noticed Ash’s finger twitch.

He thought for a long minute before reaching out and taking Ash’s hand in his, being cautious of all the wires spread across the mattress. Pikachu, who had been sleeping by Ash’s head, blinked his eyes open to glance over at Gladion. “Hello, Pikachu.” He chuckled lightly and pet the electric mouse, receiving a delighted squeak from the small Pokemon. “You’re keeping him safe, aren’t you?”

“Pika, pika.” Pikachu nuzzled into the pale boy’s hand, stretching out across Ash’s pillow with a sigh.

Gladion moved to brush some of Ash’s raven hair off his forehead and he scooched forwards in the chair, watching the younger man’s peaceful face with a sad smile. “Ash, can you hear me?...” His mouth was in a thin line as he waited for any sort of reaction, but when he got nothing, he inhaled a deep breath. “Ash, I just want you to know- I want you to know that you don’t have to fight alone anymore. We want to help you; Lillie, Mallow, Lana, Kiawe, Sophocles, Kukui, Burnet, Clemont, Bonnie, Serena, me… We’re all here for you. I’m here for you.” He tightened his grip carefully on Ash’s hand and laid his head on the side support of the bed, closing his eyes as his shoulders fell with exhaustion. “I won’t leave your side ever again.” He whispered, moving the chair closer so he could be more comfortable as he raised his head.

His emerald eyes crept open and he realized that the room was suddenly brighter than it had been just a few seconds ago. He groaned as he stretched his body out, releasing Ash’s hand in the process. He glanced over at the window to see that the sun was rising, and glancing up at the clock it finally registered in his mind that he had fallen asleep. He let out a sleepy mumble just as the door to the room opened with a delayed knock. “Hi, honey.” Lusamine entered, carrying one of Gladion’s old bags, followed by Mohn.

“Everyone has already gone home to sleep and they’ll be back later, but Professor Kukui told us that you were already napping in here. Hobbes is going to take you home so you can shower, then you can come back and stay with Ash.” Mohn explained while Lusamine placed the bag by Gladion’s feet, petting his hair when she noticed how tired he looked.

“I don’t wanna leave.” He grumbled, rubbing at his eyes.

“It’ll only be for a bit. Come on dear, it’ll make you feel better.” Lusamine helped him out of the chair and led him out of the room, letting him say a temporary goodbye to Ash before taking him to where the limousine was waiting outside.

\-----

Honey orbs flickered open sluggishly, jumping around the pristine white room with curiosity and confusion. He felt like he had been hit by a truck, groaning at the soreness of his body as he came to his senses. When he tried to speak, it came out as a croak, making him cough at how dry his throat was. “Gladion?”

The blonde boy’s head flew up from where it was previously laying in his hands, and Gladion stared at Ash’s face with a mystified expression. He seemed to be frozen in shock before a smile curled his lips and tears dripped down his face. He reached out and held Ash’s cheek, stroking the skin with his thumb like he was making sure he was real. “Ash, you’re okay…” His voice was breathy with emotion as Ash gave him a meek grin.

The ravenette leaned into the touch for a moment as he slowly moved his hand to cover Gladion’s, turning his head so he could place a gentle kiss on the older boy’s palm. “I’m sorry for worrying you.”

Gladion made a noise somewhere between a laugh and a sob as he shook his head, trying to find his voice to respond. “I’m just glad you’re here, I thought I was going to lose you.” Ash seemed to pause as his eyebrows creased together. Then he let out a short gasp and tugged at Gladion’s arm to pull him closer, wrapping him in a hug.

“You found me, didn’t you?” He whispered, his eyes watering as Gladion nodded into his shoulder and buried his face in Ash’s neck. Ash ran his fingers through Gladion’s hair as he slid his arms around Ash’s chest, holding him like if he let go Ash would disappear. “Let it out, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

The sound of the door opening alerted them both, and Holly rushed in breathing heavily. “Ash, oh my Arceus, you’re okay!” Happy tears streamed down her face, but she sniffled and rubbed at her eyes when she noticed Gladion with his arms secured around Ash’s middle. “Huh? Who’s this?”

The blonde looked like he was going to faint as he hurried to clean off his face, his features settling into their usual sharp state. He cleared his throat and sat back in the chair as Ash grinned weakly at his sister. “Holly, meet Gladion. Gladion, meet Holly.”

She perked up when she heard Gladion’s name and gave him a short wave. “It’s nice to finally meet you, though I wish it was under better conditions.” Gladion greeted her back before he excused himself to call Lillie. She scratched at her cheek, casting a worried glance at her brother. “How are you feeling?”

“Better… I’m- I’m sorry Holly. I didn’t mean to worry you all.” He sighed, scratching his bandages subconsciously and almost disturbing his IV. Holly approached the side of his bed and stilled his hand.

“Don’t be sorry, I just wish you had told us that something was wrong earlier…” She ran a hand through his hair before seeming to recall something. She reached into her pocket and held something small out to him, at which he gasped.

“Oh, Holly, I can’t-”

“Keep it, she wanted you to have it, really.” Holly placed the ring in his hand and closed his fingers over it for him, similar to what their mother had done when she handed it to Holly. He held it tentatively, examining the captivating silver band and glittering stone with a watery gaze. “Take good care of it.”

At a loss for words, he nodded in return and held the piece of jewelry close to his chest with closed eyes. He relaxed into the mattress and muttered something before falling asleep. Holly was surprised at how quickly he had drifted off, but she was glad to see him getting some rest. “Sleep well, Ash.” She stood up and walked outside to see Gladion leaning against the opposite wall, holding an Umbreon in his arms. He peeked up through his eyelashes at Holly before lifting his head. “Do you love him?”

“Huh?” His emerald eyes widened at the question and Umbreon looked up at him with a giggle.

“Do you love my brother?” She asked again, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared him down.

Gladion was deep in thought for a moment, his brow creasing as he seemed to contemplate his answer. He reflected on all of his memories with Ash, like when they had performed Z-Moves together with Solgaleo and Lunala, or when they had a battle on Ten Carat Hill, even when they had first met. At some point, Gladion had accepted that what they had was something more than just a curious friendship, but he had never considered what he felt for the boy could be _love_. Then, their day on Treasure Island moved to the forefront of his mind. His heart was glowing at the image of Ash shining like the Sun as they played in the water. He had taken Gladion’s breath away with how much he trusted him that day.

“Yes,” He spoke with complete confidence, and Holly seemed to be satisfied with his response.

“Good, but I’m not the person you should be telling.” She gestured to the hospital room door before giving him a pleased smile and walking off to the cafeteria.

Gladion swallowed thickly as he stared at the door, his legs feeling like they were cemented to the floor while his conversation with Holly echoed in his mind.


	8. Just a quick update!

I'm so sorry it's been so long! I know it has been almost a month since I've updated, I promise I'm working on the next chapter, I'm just struggling with my mental health right now so it's going to be delayed.

Again, so sorry, please bare with me <3


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